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Category: Babylon Bee

Man Has Extremely Blessed Day After Kindly Old Black Woman Tells Him To Have A Blessed Day
Babylon Bee

Man Has Extremely Blessed Day After Kindly Old Black Woman Tells Him To Have A Blessed Day

Finn McFrameMay 15, 2025

ATLANTA, GA — Local man Greg Spitzer found himself on the proverbial “cloud nine” following an encounter with a kindly…

Furious Democrats Demand To Know Who Was Responsible For Covering Up Biden’s Decline
Babylon Bee

Furious Democrats Demand To Know Who Was Responsible For Covering Up Biden’s Decline

Finn McFrameMay 14, 2025

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Democrats in Congress have angrily demanded answers as to who repeatedly lied to the American people in…

Couple Declines To Attend Chinese Underground Church Over Lack Of Children’s Programming
Babylon Bee

Couple Declines To Attend Chinese Underground Church Over Lack Of Children’s Programming

Finn McFrameMay 14, 2025

XUANHUA — One local family’s search for a new place of worship continued last weekend, as a couple declined to…

Democrats Confused By Legal Immigrants Who Seem To Love America
Babylon Bee

Democrats Confused By Legal Immigrants Who Seem To Love America

Finn McFrameMay 12, 2025

U.S. — Democrat onlookers were baffled at the unusual sight of a group of immigrants arriving in the United States…

Faux Pas: Man Gets Wife Something for Mother’s Day Even Though She’s Not His Mother
Babylon Bee

Faux Pas: Man Gets Wife Something for Mother’s Day Even Though She’s Not His Mother

Finn McFrameMay 11, 2025

INDIANAPOLIS, IN — Local man Jacob Masterson committed an embarrassing faux pas this morning when he gave his wife a…

New Pope Spends First Day Undoing All Of Former Pope’s Executive Orders
Babylon Bee

New Pope Spends First Day Undoing All Of Former Pope’s Executive Orders

Finn McFrameMay 9, 2025

VATICAN CITY — According to Vatican officials, newly elected Pope Leo XIV spent the majority of his first day on…

BREAKING: Smoke Has Risen From Buc-ee’s Indicating Fresh Brisket Is On The Board
Babylon Bee

BREAKING: Smoke Has Risen From Buc-ee’s Indicating Fresh Brisket Is On The Board

Finn McFrameMay 7, 2025

WACO, TX — The gathered crowds broke out into deafening cheers as smoke rose from Buc-ee’s this afternoon, indicating fresh…

Fox News Calls Papacy For Joe Biden
Babylon Bee

Fox News Calls Papacy For Joe Biden

Finn McFrameMay 7, 2025

U.S. — Fox News has announced that it is ready to officially project the winner of the papacy, calling the…

Sad: AOC Unable To Obtain Real ID Because She Died On Jan 6 And Is A Ghost
Babylon Bee

Sad: AOC Unable To Obtain Real ID Because She Died On Jan 6 And Is A Ghost

Finn McFrameMay 7, 2025

WASHINGTON, D.C. — The national movement to require everyone to convert their forms of identification continued to receive pushback as…

Trump Sends In Nicolas Cage To Reoccupy Alcatraz
Babylon Bee

Trump Sends In Nicolas Cage To Reoccupy Alcatraz

Finn McFrameMay 7, 2025

SAN FRANCISCO — Nicolas Cage has successfully infiltrated Alcatraz after being tapped by President Trump to reoccupy the famous island…

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  1. CirrusFlash on Oh great, another overpriced ski simulator nobody asked for is getting a shiny new trailer and a collector’s edition, whoop-de-doo 🙄 ⛷️ 👻 💰.April 25, 2025

    Another celebrity podcast? Can\'t wait to authenticity.

  2. canary apple red on HBO Bends the Knee to Rowling: Trans Rights? Apparently Not as Magical as Galleons! 🤑April 25, 2025

    Another celebrity podcast? Can\'t wait to Ryan.

  3. Bleach on 🛒Amazon Takes Full Control of 007: James Bond Gears Up for the Battle of Likes and Discounts🎬April 25, 2025

    The Met Gala theme this year: \'millionaires but make it expensive.\'

  4. Crazy Eights on Oblivion Remaster: ‘Body Type’ vs ‘Gender’ – Who Won This Clown Show? 🤡🎉April 25, 2025

    Another celebrity podcast? Can\'t wait to 5000.

  5. Sleek Assassin on 🤠 Amazon Reinvents Mass Effect: Forget the Reapers, Meet Galactic Two-Day Shipping!April 25, 2025

    Award shows: where sponsored hand each other trophies for existing.

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