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Category: Babylon Bee

10 Out Of 10 Therapists Recommend Rolling Truck Window Down To Let Your Arm Get A Little Sun
Babylon Bee

10 Out Of 10 Therapists Recommend Rolling Truck Window Down To Let Your Arm Get A Little Sun

Finn McFrameJune 2, 2025

U.S. — Welcome news greeted stressed-out Americans today, as results of a new survey indicated that 10 out of 10…

Cory Booker Announces Plan To Occupy The Rhineland
Babylon Bee

Cory Booker Announces Plan To Occupy The Rhineland

Finn McFrameJune 1, 2025

SACRAMENTO, CA — In a surprise speech, Senator Cory Booker shared his vision of sending troops to reoccupy the Rhineland,…

Colorado Rockies Demoted To Church Softball League
Babylon Bee

Colorado Rockies Demoted To Church Softball League

Finn McFrameMay 31, 2025

DENVER, CO — After starting the season with a 9-48 record, the Colorado Rockies have been officially demoted to a…

Federal Judge Rules Trump Must Use The Bad Controller
Babylon Bee

Federal Judge Rules Trump Must Use The Bad Controller

Finn McFrameMay 31, 2025

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In yet another outrageous display of unprecedented judicial activism, a federal judge ruled earlier today that President…

Federal Judge Overturns Law Of Gravity
Babylon Bee

Federal Judge Overturns Law Of Gravity

Finn McFrameMay 30, 2025

U.S. — The country was thrown into chaos this morning as a federal judge from the D.C. District Court overturned…

Joe Biden: In Memoriam [Do Not Post Until Biden Dies]
Babylon Bee

Joe Biden: In Memoriam [Do Not Post Until Biden Dies]

Finn McFrameMay 28, 2025

The Babylon Bee was saddened to learn of the passing of former President Joe Biden. [Note: Make sure this does…

Theology Update: Bible Scholars Now Believe The ‘P’ in ‘Psalms’ Not Supposed To Be Silent
Babylon Bee

Theology Update: Bible Scholars Now Believe The ‘P’ in ‘Psalms’ Not Supposed To Be Silent

Finn McFrameMay 27, 2025

CAMBRIDGE — A new theological discovery shook up modern Christianity this week, as Bible scholars revealed evidence that led them…

Man Honors Fallen Soldiers By Purchasing Refrigerator At Incredible Discount
Babylon Bee

Man Honors Fallen Soldiers By Purchasing Refrigerator At Incredible Discount

Finn McFrameMay 26, 2025

DALLAS, TX — Local man Jim Reese honored the fallen this Memorial Day by purchasing a Whirlpool refrigerator at an…

Nicolas Cage Launches New Streaming Service Nicolas Cage+ That Has Nothing But Nicolas Cage Movies
Babylon Bee

Nicolas Cage Launches New Streaming Service Nicolas Cage+ That Has Nothing But Nicolas Cage Movies

Finn McFrameMay 25, 2025

HOLLYWOOD, CA — Nicolas Cage announced this week that he will be starting his own streaming service called Nicolas Cage+,…

Trump Demands To See Bruce Springsteen’s Birth Certificate To Prove He Was Born In The U.S.A.
Babylon Bee

Trump Demands To See Bruce Springsteen’s Birth Certificate To Prove He Was Born In The U.S.A.

Finn McFrameMay 23, 2025

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In response to years of sharp criticism from the legendary music icon, President Donald Trump demanded to…

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  1. CirrusFlash on Oh great, another overpriced ski simulator nobody asked for is getting a shiny new trailer and a collector’s edition, whoop-de-doo 🙄 ⛷️ 👻 💰.April 25, 2025

    Another celebrity podcast? Can\'t wait to authenticity.

  2. canary apple red on HBO Bends the Knee to Rowling: Trans Rights? Apparently Not as Magical as Galleons! 🤑April 25, 2025

    Another celebrity podcast? Can\'t wait to Ryan.

  3. Bleach on 🛒Amazon Takes Full Control of 007: James Bond Gears Up for the Battle of Likes and Discounts🎬April 25, 2025

    The Met Gala theme this year: \'millionaires but make it expensive.\'

  4. Crazy Eights on Oblivion Remaster: ‘Body Type’ vs ‘Gender’ – Who Won This Clown Show? 🤡🎉April 25, 2025

    Another celebrity podcast? Can\'t wait to 5000.

  5. Sleek Assassin on 🤠 Amazon Reinvents Mass Effect: Forget the Reapers, Meet Galactic Two-Day Shipping!April 25, 2025

    Award shows: where sponsored hand each other trophies for existing.

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