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Category: Breaking

Oh great, MORE Darkness!
Breaking, Movie News

Oh great, MORE Darkness!

FinnSeptember 18, 2025September 18, 2025

Oh great, The Darkness is back 🙄. Yes, that iconic, long-running (and by “long-running” we mean “milked dry”) series is…

Carpenter’s Kid: Cage Rage, Twiggy Terror, and Biblical B-Movie Mayhem
Breaking, Movie News

Carpenter’s Kid: Cage Rage, Twiggy Terror, and Biblical B-Movie Mayhem

FinnSeptember 18, 2025September 18, 2025

OMG! 😱 They actually greenlit this?! The Carpenter’s Son is allegedly a “horror” film (we’ll see about that 🙄) brought…

OMG! Sharon Osbourne Almost KICKED Chevelle’s BUTTS Off OZZFEST 2003?! LOL!
Breaking, Music News

OMG! Sharon Osbourne Almost KICKED Chevelle’s BUTTS Off OZZFEST 2003?! LOL!

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 18, 2025September 18, 2025

Oh, look, another band member reminiscing about the good ol’ days of touring with rock legends. This time, it’s CHEVELLE’s…

Bonfire Studios Pukes Out Arkheron, Hopelessly Flailing Up Some Random Tower
Breaking, Games News

Bonfire Studios Pukes Out Arkheron, Hopelessly Flailing Up Some Random Tower

Pixel P. SnarkbyteSeptember 17, 2025September 17, 2025

Oh boy, another one bites the dust! Bonfire Studios, bless their cotton socks, is unleashing Arkheron upon us, a PvP…

BIOHAZARD Dropping Another Banger Called ‘Death Of Me’ From Their Super Original Album ‘Divided We Fall’
Breaking, Music News

BIOHAZARD Dropping Another Banger Called ‘Death Of Me’ From Their Super Original Album ‘Divided We Fall’

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 17, 2025September 17, 2025

Okay, so, like, BIOHAZARD, those dudes who peaked when dial-up was still a thing, dropped a “visualizer” for their new…

Ozzy’s New Doc: Prepare for Absolutely Zero Escape (You’ve Been Warned)
Breaking, Music News

Ozzy’s New Doc: Prepare for Absolutely Zero Escape (You’ve Been Warned)

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 17, 2025September 17, 2025

Paramount+, in its infinite wisdom, is gracing us with a documentary about Ozzy Osbourne, because apparently, we haven’t suffered enough.💩…

Assassin’s Creed Black Flag Remake Rumors? Oh, Honey, Here We Go Again
Breaking, Games News

Assassin’s Creed Black Flag Remake Rumors? Oh, Honey, Here We Go Again

Pixel P. SnarkbyteSeptember 17, 2025September 17, 2025

OMG! 😱 More “Totally Reliable” Info on the Assassin’s Creed Black Flag Remake (That May or May Not Exist)! This…

Netflix’s Splinter Cell: Deathwatch Trailer Vomits Enough Violence to Make John Wick Blush (and Maybe Hurl)
Breaking, Movie News

Netflix’s Splinter Cell: Deathwatch Trailer Vomits Enough Violence to Make John Wick Blush (and Maybe Hurl)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteSeptember 17, 2025September 17, 2025

Okay, folks, buckle up because Netflix, in its infinite wisdom, has decided to grace us with a full-length trailer for…

“Batman’s Most Important Scene: Prepare to Have Your Mind Mildly Bent”
Breaking, Movie News

“Batman’s Most Important Scene: Prepare to Have Your Mind Mildly Bent”

FinnSeptember 17, 2025September 17, 2025

Prepare yourselves, peasants, for the revelation of the *most important* Batman scene EVER! 🙄 You thought it was the death…

“How to Make Your Project a Hilarious Disaster with Collaborative Software (or Not)”
Breaking, Games News

“How to Make Your Project a Hilarious Disaster with Collaborative Software (or Not)”

Pixel P. SnarkbyteSeptember 17, 2025September 17, 2025

Alright, buckle up buttercups 🐴, because we’re about to dive headfirst into the thrilling, absolutely-not-at-all-obvious world of “collaborative” software development.…

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Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
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