Category: The Onion

    Read MoreThe OnionNEW BERLIN, NY—Taking the rookie employee aside to offer him “a word to the wise,” Chobani CEO Hamdi…

    Read MoreThe OnionA runaway kangaroo named Sheila managed to shut down a stretch of interstate in Alabama before state troopers…

    Read MoreThe OnionWASHINGTON—Growing increasingly frustrated by the protracted diplomatic talks, President Donald Trump asserted Thursday that Russia must be allowed…

    Read MoreThe OnionSPOKANE, WA—Lamenting that all his effort had been in vain, area man Evan Stackelberg told reporters Thursday that…

    Read MoreThe OnionA blackout brought much of Spain and Portugal to a standstill, halting subway and railway trains, cutting phone…

    Read MoreThe OnionThe post Elon Musk Creates Federal Employee Revenge Porn Database appeared first on The Onion.   FinnFinn McFrame, celebrated…

    Read MoreThe OnionITHACA, NY—In an effort to help Americans get a better night’s rest, sleep experts from Cornell University issued…

    Read MoreThe OnionThe post Anderson Cooper Undergoes Cosmetic Surgery To Look Even More Concerned appeared first on The Onion.   FinnFinn…

    Read MoreThe OnionThe post Misfortune Cookie appeared first on The Onion.   FinnFinn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of…

    Read MoreThe OnionLOWELL, MA—Doing her best to follow her therapist’s advice for dealing with stressful situations, area woman Holly Debling…