Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Mayhem

Woody and Buzz Return in Toy Story 5: Prepare for More Existential Dread and Plastic Mayhem
Breaking, Movie News

Woody and Buzz Return in Toy Story 5: Prepare for More Existential Dread and Plastic Mayhem

FinnNovember 11, 2025November 11, 2025

Woody and Buzz, those dusty relics of childhood, are back for Toy Story 5, because apparently, Pixar ran out of…

Static & Wife: A Love Story for the Ages (Said No One Ever)
Breaking, Music News

Static & Wife: A Love Story for the Ages (Said No One Ever)

Chord F. DiscordNovember 5, 2025November 5, 2025

OMG! 😱 Matt Zane, the visionary behind such cinematic masterpieces as Wayne Static’s solo videos 🙄, is launching a crowdfunding…

Fortnite’s Simpsons Collab: Prepare for Yellow Mayhem and Questionable Content
Breaking, Games News

Fortnite’s Simpsons Collab: Prepare for Yellow Mayhem and Questionable Content

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 3, 2025November 3, 2025

Well, well, well, look who finally crawled out of their basements 🙄! Epic Games, in their infinite wisdom (or lack…

CNN’s Oct 29 Extravaganza: Melissa’s Tantrums, Asia’s Adventures, Trump’s Encore, Mideast Mayhem, and Boating Bloopers
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN’s Oct 29 Extravaganza: Melissa’s Tantrums, Asia’s Adventures, Trump’s Encore, Mideast Mayhem, and Boating Bloopers

Big ElephantOctober 29, 2025October 29, 2025

Every pathetic, virtue-signaling air traffic controller in the US received a whopping zero-dollar paystub this week. Cry me a river!…

MAYHEM’s ‘Grand Declaration Of War’ Re-Released Because They Need More Money
Breaking, Music News

MAYHEM’s ‘Grand Declaration Of War’ Re-Released Because They Need More Money

Chord F. DiscordOctober 15, 2025October 15, 2025

MAYHEM: the band that proves you can get away with anything as long as you have corpse paint and a…

Monsters & Cult Classics: Prepare for Brain-Melting Horrorthon Movie Mayhem
Live

Monsters & Cult Classics: Prepare for Brain-Melting Horrorthon Movie Mayhem

Chuck B. BallsyOctober 13, 2025

**OMG! 🙄 Join the “Monsters vs Cult Classic Horrorthon Marathon”!** Dracula (1931) at 7:30 PM? 🧛‍♂️ Seriously? Followed by Frankenstein…

Ice Nine Kills Drools Over ’89 Batman, Churns Out Another Generic Track for Clueless Fanboys
Breaking, Music News

Ice Nine Kills Drools Over ’89 Batman, Churns Out Another Generic Track for Clueless Fanboys

Chord F. DiscordOctober 9, 2025October 9, 2025

ICE NINE KILLS, those maestros of musical mayhem, 🤡 invite you to “dance with the devil in the pale moonlight”…

TMNT Does a ‘Home Alone’ Bit? Cowabunga, I Guess
Breaking, Movie News

TMNT Does a ‘Home Alone’ Bit? Cowabunga, I Guess

FinnOctober 7, 2025October 7, 2025

Oh, sweet merciful pepperoni! 🍕 The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, those pizza-guzzling, sewer-dwelling reptiles, are apparently slumming it in New…

TGS 2025: NetEase Dumps Another Open-World RPG Into the Void, Praying It Sticks
Breaking, Games News

TGS 2025: NetEase Dumps Another Open-World RPG Into the Void, Praying It Sticks

Pixel P. SnarkbyteOctober 7, 2025October 7, 2025

Okay, so I went to TGS 2025 🙄, fully expecting another generic gacha game, and NetEase’s Ananta shows up like…

NYC Open Mic Night: Prepare for Mandarin Mayhem
Live

NYC Open Mic Night: Prepare for Mandarin Mayhem

Chuck B. BallsyOctober 4, 2025

**OMG! 🙄 Be On Time! 1:30-2PM Sharp!** Or Else! 😈 Open Mic Tickets: $10 ($7.47+fee). Minimum Purchase: One (1) Drink…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 6 7 8 … 11 Next

Latest posts

  • Dolly Parton Musical Unveils Star Studded Cast And Free Tickets
  • Donnie Darko’s Iconic Rabbit Remains Cultural Phenomenon Years Later
  • Slash Unleashes New Album and Tour with Myles Kennedy
  • NVIDIA democratizes AI overkill with slightly less absurd DGX Spark option
  • Gypsy Rose’s boyfriend calls it quits on life at 34

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.