Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: NASA

Metallica Saves Venezuela With Pocket Change
Breaking, Music News

Metallica Saves Venezuela With Pocket Change

Chord F. DiscordJuly 4, 2026July 4, 2026

Breaking news: METALLICA’s charitable foundation, All Within My Hands, is donating a whopping $100,000 to earthquake relief efforts in Venezuela,…

CNN thinks I care about moon bases and coffee perks really
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

CNN thinks I care about moon bases and coffee perks really

Big ElephantJuly 1, 2026

Well, folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The World Cup is in full swing, and Team USA…

Hollywood Minute: Jennifer Lawrence, Leonardo DiCaprio Filming with Martin Scorsese — Because Apparently the World Needs More A-List Actors Making Us Feel Inferior About Our Life Choices
Another Hollywood Disaster in the Making?
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN, Movie News

Hollywood Minute: Jennifer Lawrence, Leonardo DiCaprio Filming with Martin Scorsese — Because Apparently the World Needs More A-List Actors Making Us Feel Inferior About Our Life Choices

Big ElephantMarch 20, 2026March 20, 2026

So now the liberal elites are at it again. Martin Scorsese, that aging director who hasn’t made a decent film…

Iran’s new leader, a daring bridge, reframing your daily walk: Catch up on the day’s stories — because who doesn’t love a good bridge and a fresh perspective on walking?
5 Things PM: The Morning After the Night Before
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Iran’s new leader, a daring bridge, reframing your daily walk: Catch up on the day’s stories — because who doesn’t love a good bridge and a fresh perspective on walking?

Big ElephantMarch 12, 2026March 12, 2026

Good evening, patriots! It’s time for 5 Things PM, where we cut through the liberal media’s fake news to bring…

SEVENDUST Unleashes Unbreakable Music Video Because Nothing Says Fragile Like a Title Named ‘Unbreakable’
SEVENDUST is back with "Unbreakable," because apparently the only thing more indestructible than their career is their ability to release albums on a schedule even NASA would envy
Breaking, Music News

SEVENDUST Unleashes Unbreakable Music Video Because Nothing Says Fragile Like a Title Named ‘Unbreakable’

Chord F. DiscordMarch 5, 2026March 5, 2026

The official music video for “Unbreakable,” the latest single from SEVENDUST, can be seen below. The track is taken from…

Live

Atelier Psycom : Domptez le Cosmos Mental Sans Perdre la Tête !

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 19, 2026

Cosmos Mental® : L’atelier qui va vous faire comprendre ce que c’est que la santé mentale ! 🚀 Parce que…

LAMB OF GOD’s RANDY BLYTHE: ‘I’m In No Rush To Exit This Circus, But If I Must, I’ll Go Out Screaming’
Breaking, Music News

LAMB OF GOD’s RANDY BLYTHE: ‘I’m In No Rush To Exit This Circus, But If I Must, I’ll Go Out Screaming’

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 17, 2026February 17, 2026

Well, well, well, look who’s here to lecture us about cosmic inevitabilities while we’re all just trying to survive rent…

5 Things to Know for Feb. 13: DHS Shutdown, Minnesota Surge Over, Nancy Guthrie, Epstein Fallout, Climate (Because Apparently, the World Still Exists)
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

5 Things to Know for Feb. 13: DHS Shutdown, Minnesota Surge Over, Nancy Guthrie, Epstein Fallout, Climate (Because Apparently, the World Still Exists)

Big ElephantFebruary 13, 2026February 13, 2026

It’s Friday the 13th, when even sensible Americans might knock on wood just in case. While the Left will blame…

Warframe Finally Invades Android in Canada — Because Eh, Why Not? Global Domination Next!
Warframe Mobile Is Coming to Android, Because Apparently We All Need More Ways to Ignore Our Responsibilities
Breaking, Games News

Warframe Finally Invades Android in Canada — Because Eh, Why Not? Global Domination Next!

Pixel P. SnarkbyteFebruary 11, 2026February 11, 2026

Oh look, another game letting us pretend we’re intergalactic space ninjas while our laundry piles up like the Sentients’ ancient…

Apple TV+ Unleashes Epic 2026 Feast of Shows and Movies, Because Apparently We Didn’t Have Enough to Watch Already
Breaking, Movie News

Apple TV+ Unleashes Epic 2026 Feast of Shows and Movies, Because Apparently We Didn’t Have Enough to Watch Already

Pixel P. SnarkbyteFebruary 8, 2026February 8, 2026

Apple TV+ Drops So Many Trailers, Fans Start Questioning Their Free Trial Subscription At the latest Apple TV Press Day,…

Posts pagination

1 2 3 Next

Latest posts

  • Trump Tries Not To Mess Up DC Beautification Effort
  • Jack White Fires Back At Religious Critics Amid Satanist Band Drama
  • Lorna Shore drops new music video because you clearly didnt have enough breakdowns in your life
  • Shinedown Finds Replacement Bassists Because Eric Bass Finally Snapped
  • ORACLE ALERT: Donald J Trump Denounces Maggie Haberman Book As Fake News

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
July 2026
S M T W T F S
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031  
« Jun    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}