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Tag: Oblivion

Sophie Turner Spotted Searching For Lost Sequel While Dressed As Lara Croft As Prime Video Desperately Hopes You Forgot About Those Last Movies
Breaking, Movie News

Sophie Turner Spotted Searching For Lost Sequel While Dressed As Lara Croft As Prime Video Desperately Hopes You Forgot About Those Last Movies

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 15, 2026January 15, 2026

🚨BREAKING NEWS, GAMERS & NON-BELIEVERS! 🚨 The internet has officially melted down because Prime Video just dropped the first image…

JetBlue Plane Had an Almost-Kiss with US Air Force Jet Over Venezuela
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

JetBlue Plane Had an Almost-Kiss with US Air Force Jet Over Venezuela

Big ElephantDecember 14, 2025December 14, 2025

JetBlue Pilot Nearly Crashes Into Ghost Tanker, Blames Invisible Air Force While Democrats Cheer A JetBlue flight from Curaçao to…

The LA Brunch Club Where Avocado Toast Costs More Than Your Rent
Live

The LA Brunch Club Where Avocado Toast Costs More Than Your Rent

Chuck B. BallsyDecember 13, 2025

🚨 BREAKING: “The LA Brunch Club” demands your presence—and possibly your soul. 🥂 This 21+ extravaganza promises mimosas, vibes, and…

First Official Game Based On The Boys Finally Lets You Live Out Your Superhero Fantasies (And By That We Mean Getting Exploded By Homelander)
Breaking, Games News

First Official Game Based On The Boys Finally Lets You Live Out Your Superhero Fantasies (And By That We Mean Getting Exploded By Homelander)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteDecember 9, 2025December 9, 2025

🐄 Holy Cow! The Boys Are Back—And This Time, They’re in VR So You Can Virtually Puke from Blood, Gore,…

Layne Staley’s Diary: Now Good for Something Besides Gathering Dust
Breaking, Music News

Layne Staley’s Diary: Now Good for Something Besides Gathering Dust

Chord F. DiscordNovember 21, 2025November 21, 2025

OMG! 😱 Did you hear? “This Angry Pen Of Mine: Recovering The Journals Of Layne Staley” – a totally authorized…

EPICA’s Asian Tour Gets the Boot ‘Cause Simone’s Feeling Kinda Meh
Live, Music News

EPICA’s Asian Tour Gets the Boot ‘Cause Simone’s Feeling Kinda Meh

Chord F. DiscordNovember 11, 2025November 11, 2025

OMG! 😱 You won’t BELIEVE this! EPICA, those symphonic metal darlings who peaked like, a decade ago, are POSTPONING their…

TESLA About to Butcher SUPERTRAMP, THE TEMPTATIONS, CLIMAX BLUES BAND Classics in Ill-Advised Covers Album
Breaking, Music News

TESLA About to Butcher SUPERTRAMP, THE TEMPTATIONS, CLIMAX BLUES BAND Classics in Ill-Advised Covers Album

Chord F. DiscordNovember 8, 2025November 8, 2025

🚨BREAKING: TESLA, Gods of Obscurity, Announce Covers Album to Save Jeff Keith’s Voice from Total Oblivion🚨 🎸So, apparently, TESLA, those…

GOP Lawmakers Grow a Spine, Maybe? (Don’t Hold Your Breath)
Elephant Reads CNN

GOP Lawmakers Grow a Spine, Maybe? (Don’t Hold Your Breath)

Big ElephantOctober 29, 2025October 29, 2025

The liberal media is at it again, trying to spin a narrative of GOP dissent against our glorious President Trump!…

Jeff Becerra Says POSSESSED’s New Album Will Be ‘Different’ – Translation: ‘We’re Screwed’
Breaking, Music News

Jeff Becerra Says POSSESSED’s New Album Will Be ‘Different’ – Translation: ‘We’re Screwed’

Chord F. DiscordOctober 13, 2025October 13, 2025

In a riveting exposé with Australia’s Devil’s Horns Zine, POSSESSED frontman Jeff Becerra, who, let’s be honest, probably spends more…

Nvidia Dumps $100B into OpenAI’s Money Furnace Because Why Not
Elephant Reads CNN

Nvidia Dumps $100B into OpenAI’s Money Furnace Because Why Not

Big ElephantSeptember 22, 2025September 22, 2025

Folks, can you believe this? Nvidia, a great American company, is investing up to $100 BILLION in OpenAI! That’s right,…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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