Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Outside

Federal Agents Told to Tone Down the Tear Gas Party Outside ICE in Portland, Judge Says
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Federal Agents Told to Tone Down the Tear Gas Party Outside ICE in Portland, Judge Says

Big ElephantFebruary 4, 2026February 4, 2026

Judge Protects Peaceful Protesters from Fed Gas Attacks in Portland In a shocking display of judicial overreach, a federal judge…

Virtual Boy On Switch Online: Nintendo’s Bold Attempt to Make You Question Your Life Choices Again
Breaking, Games News

Virtual Boy On Switch Online: Nintendo’s Bold Attempt to Make You Question Your Life Choices Again

Pixel P. SnarkbyteFebruary 3, 2026February 3, 2026

In a move that perhaps no one could have expected, the Virtual Boy is joining the Nintendo Switch Online +…

Live

Ladies First W/ Bino Rideaux: He’s Here to Sing, Not to Court Your Grandma

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 2, 2026

Ladies First: Where the DJ’s in the Crowd and You’re the Star Step right up, ladies! 🎉 Introducing “Ladies First,”…

Live

“Top Celebs and Artists Gather at Skybar Afterparty—Because Who Needs Sleep When You’re Famous?”

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 1, 2026

✨ 67th Annual Music Awards After Party at Skybar ✨ Because nothing says “I’m relevant” like standing in line at…

Live

Jersey City Whiskey and Spirits Fest: Where You Can Legally Pretend You’re an Alcoholic for a Day

Chuck B. BallsyJanuary 31, 2026

🍻 Welcome to the ultimate booze bonanza! Sample whiskies from Kentucky to Mexico, Russia, and beyond. Not into whiskey? No…

“Iran’s Internet Blackout: Protesters Crushed, Skylar Thompson Guest Stars on CNNi in a Plot Twist No One Saw Coming (Except PSEG1, Obviously)”
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

“Iran’s Internet Blackout: Protesters Crushed, Skylar Thompson Guest Stars on CNNi in a Plot Twist No One Saw Coming (Except PSEG1, Obviously)”

Big ElephantJanuary 30, 2026January 30, 2026

Wow, Iran’s crackdown on protesters and internet blackout? What a shocker! Looks like the mullahs are getting desperate now that…

“London’s Hiring Event: Where Your Resume Gets More Attention Than Your Ex”
Live

“London’s Hiring Event: Where Your Resume Gets More Attention Than Your Ex”

Chuck B. BallsyJanuary 28, 2026

🚨Attention job seekers!🚨 Join us for a day of corporate stalking! Dress like you’re trying to impress your Tinder date,…

Zakk Wylde’s Acoustic Set Confirmed: Amoeba Hollywood To Host Unplanned Therapy Session for Confused Metalheads
Breaking, Music News

Zakk Wylde’s Acoustic Set Confirmed: Amoeba Hollywood To Host Unplanned Therapy Session for Confused Metalheads

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 27, 2026January 27, 2026

BREAKING NEWS: Guitar Demigod Zakk Wylde Temporarily Abandons Shredding to Play Folk Music at Record Store, Chaos Ensues 🎸💥 Hold…

Sophie Turner Slapped With a Pickaxe and Forced to Raid Tombs Because Netflix Can’t Leave Classic Video Games Alone
Breaking, Games News, Movie News

Sophie Turner Slapped With a Pickaxe and Forced to Raid Tombs Because Netflix Can’t Leave Classic Video Games Alone

FinnJanuary 26, 2026January 26, 2026

Behold, mortals! Amazon has finally graced us with the first official image of Sophie Turner as Lara Croft, and folks,…

Ex-DEICIDE Guitarist JACK OWEN Tells Glen Benton He Wasn’t In His Weird Little Bubble But Thanks For The Invitation Anyway
Breaking, Music News

Ex-DEICIDE Guitarist JACK OWEN Tells Glen Benton He Wasn’t In His Weird Little Bubble But Thanks For The Invitation Anyway

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 26, 2026January 26, 2026

So, here we are again, folks. Another day, another former member of a legendary death metal band throwing shade like…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 14 15 16 … 21 Next

Latest posts

  • Tinder tired of helping you avoid humans
  • Trump Brings Chaos To Ireland Because Why Not
  • Sometime in February in Charlotte, NC (09/11/2026)
  • Hinayana in Charlotte, NC (09/11/2026)
  • Fires in the Distance in Charlotte, NC (09/11/2026)

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
September 2026
S M T W T F S
 12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
27282930  
« Aug    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.