Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: prison

Menendez Bros Still Got That Slammer Swag: Parole Denied LOL
Elephant Reads CNN

Menendez Bros Still Got That Slammer Swag: Parole Denied LOL

Big ElephantAugust 23, 2025August 23, 2025

Looks like those Menendez brothers, famous for their *totally* justified actions against their parents, won’t be getting out of the…

Brent Hinds’ Untimely Departure: Atlanta’s Music Scene Weeps (Or Maybe Just Has Allergies)
Breaking, Music News

Brent Hinds’ Untimely Departure: Atlanta’s Music Scene Weeps (Or Maybe Just Has Allergies)

Chord F. DiscordAugust 22, 2025August 22, 2025

Atlanta News First, purveyors of the finest clickbait, have graced us with a video report on the totally unexpected demise…

Shenmue III Finally Escapes PS4/PC Prison: Now Torturing Xbox & Switch Players
Breaking, Games News

Shenmue III Finally Escapes PS4/PC Prison: Now Torturing Xbox & Switch Players

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 18, 2025August 18, 2025

Oh my freaking god! 😱 They’re actually doing it! Shenmue III, the game that single-handedly redefined the term “glacial pacing,”…

Delta Farce: This F2P FPS Might Actually Be Okay (No, Really)
Breaking, Games News

Delta Farce: This F2P FPS Might Actually Be Okay (No, Really)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 18, 2025August 18, 2025

Oh no, another PC game that console peasants 🤢 can’t play? Boo-hoo. Seriously though, as a dedicated console gamer (because…

James Gunn is Desperate to Resurrect This Forgotten Loser for the New DCU
Breaking, Movie News

James Gunn is Desperate to Resurrect This Forgotten Loser for the New DCU

FinnAugust 15, 2025August 15, 2025

Oh, dear, James Gunn, the alleged mastermind behind the new DC Universe, apparently has a soft spot for… wait for…

OMG! Hong Kong Media Mogul Turns US-China Tug-of-War Into Hilarious Reality Show
Elephant Reads CNN

OMG! Hong Kong Media Mogul Turns US-China Tug-of-War Into Hilarious Reality Show

Big ElephantAugust 15, 2025August 15, 2025

Oh, look, CNN is shedding crocodile tears over Jimmy Lai, the Hong Kong “freedom fighter” who’s about to find out…

Colorado Prison Gets Wildfire-Induced Vacay, Courtesy of Mother Nature’s Arsonist Skills | CNN
Elephant Reads CNN

Colorado Prison Gets Wildfire-Induced Vacay, Courtesy of Mother Nature’s Arsonist Skills | CNN

Big ElephantAugust 11, 2025August 11, 2025

Another day, another crisis courtesy of the Liberal Loons and their eco-agenda! A Colorado prison evacuated because of a wildfire?…

Oregon Man’s Hobby of Body Disposal Gets Him a Free Upgrade: Now Charged in Fourth Accidental Death
Elephant Reads CNN

Oregon Man’s Hobby of Body Disposal Gets Him a Free Upgrade: Now Charged in Fourth Accidental Death

Big ElephantAugust 6, 2025August 6, 2025

Another day, another tragedy in the once-great city of Portland, now a festering pit of liberal decay. A man, Jesse…

Girlfriend of Dude Who Dun Goofed in Tennessee Baby Drama Also Related to the Victims? Buckle Up, Buttercup
Elephant Reads CNN

Girlfriend of Dude Who Dun Goofed in Tennessee Baby Drama Also Related to the Victims? Buckle Up, Buttercup

Big ElephantAugust 6, 2025August 6, 2025

Well, folks, another day, another disaster courtesy of the liberal elite’s soft-on-crime policies! This Tennessee tragedy, where a convicted felon…

Scott Stapp’s New Masterpiece: ‘Deadman’s Trigger’ Featuring His Budding Child Actor
Breaking, Movie News, Music News

Scott Stapp’s New Masterpiece: ‘Deadman’s Trigger’ Featuring His Budding Child Actor

Chord F. DiscordAugust 2, 2025August 2, 2025

Grammy-winning artiste, solo sensation, and, let’s be real, the main reason CREED existed, Scott Stapp, has unleashed “Deadman’s Trigger: A…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 10 11 12 … 14 Next

Latest posts

  • Foo Fighters Rock Hollywood Bowl with LA Philharmonic
  • Dolly Parton Gets Digital With Avatar Concerts Coming Soon
  • Meg White Mixup Daily Mail Trails Wrong Woman
  • THE ORACLE SPEAKS Donald Trump posts on Truth Social from August 23 2026
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Donald Trump shares message on Truth Social platform today

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.