Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Rumor

Ace Frehley’s Brain Explodes: Life Support Update
Breaking, Music News

Ace Frehley’s Brain Explodes: Life Support Update

Chord F. DiscordOctober 16, 2025October 16, 2025

🚨BREAKING NEWS🚨: According to TMZ.com, the one and only, the *legendary* (air quotes, people) KISS guitarist Ace Frehley is currently…

‘Five Nights at Freddy’s’ Fans Somehow Okay With Megan Fox Playing a Chicken
Breaking, Movie News

‘Five Nights at Freddy’s’ Fans Somehow Okay With Megan Fox Playing a Chicken

FinnOctober 13, 2025October 13, 2025

HOLY. CHICKEN. NUGGETS. 🐔 They actually cast Megan Fox in Five Nights at Freddy’s 2. As Toy Chica? Are you…

Ace Frehley Aborts Mission 2025: Blames It On The Space Flu Again
Breaking, Music News

Ace Frehley Aborts Mission 2025: Blames It On The Space Flu Again

Chord F. DiscordOctober 6, 2025October 6, 2025

OMG! Ace Frehley, the Spaceman who clearly hasn’t found his way back to Earth 👽, has pulled the plug 🔌…

Florida Man Steals $20K From Disney While Dressed as Aquaman’s Less Impressive Cousin
Breaking

Florida Man Steals $20K From Disney While Dressed as Aquaman’s Less Impressive Cousin

FinnSeptember 19, 2025September 19, 2025

Breaking News: Some Absolute Mad Lad Robs Disney World Restaurant in Scuba Gear 🤿💰! We can’t even make this stuff…

Wolverine Game: Leaks Say It’s Soon (Duh)
Breaking, Games News

Wolverine Game: Leaks Say It’s Soon (Duh)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteSeptember 15, 2025September 15, 2025

Alright, listen up, bub! 😼 Word on the digital street (aka Mp1st, which is totally a reliable source, trust me…

Vampire: The Masquerade – Bloodlines II: Now With Even MORE Choices (That Probably Don’t Matter)
Breaking, Games News

Vampire: The Masquerade – Bloodlines II: Now With Even MORE Choices (That Probably Don’t Matter)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteSeptember 7, 2025September 7, 2025

Oh, honey, let’s talk about Vampire: The Masquerade, that little tabletop RPG from 1991 that just WON’T die 🧛. Yeah,…

BBC Ghosting Ozzy: Doc Vanishes into Thin Air
Breaking, Music News

BBC Ghosting Ozzy: Doc Vanishes into Thin Air

Chord F. DiscordAugust 18, 2025August 18, 2025

So, apparently, some earth-shattering, life-altering, Pulitzer-deserving piece of cinematic gold 🏆 titled “Ozzy Osbourne: Coming Home” was supposed to grace…

Ubisoft Milks Far Cry for TV Show, FX Desperate for Content
Breaking, Games News, Movie News

Ubisoft Milks Far Cry for TV Show, FX Desperate for Content

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 12, 2025August 12, 2025

Oh, great, another video game adaptation nobody asked for! 🙄 Apparently, Ubisoft, in their infinite wisdom (or maybe after one…

Spider-Man’s New Duds: Tom Holland’s Got a Freshly-Squeezed Suit!
Breaking, Movie News

Spider-Man’s New Duds: Tom Holland’s Got a Freshly-Squeezed Suit!

FinnAugust 3, 2025August 3, 2025

Are you READY for a Brand New Day? 🙄 Or, like, another Spider-Man costume that’s totally gonna revolutionize the cinematic…

MORTAL SIN Dusts Off Skeletons, Threatens 2026 Stage Return
Breaking, Music News

MORTAL SIN Dusts Off Skeletons, Threatens 2026 Stage Return

Chord F. DiscordJuly 25, 2025July 25, 2025

MORTAL SIN, Australia’s… well, *a* thrash metal band, is apparently staggering back onto the stage in 2026. Yes, you read…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 3 4 5 Next

Latest posts

  • THE ORACLE SPEAKS: DJT blasts Canada over tariffs and statehood demands
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Mark Levin claims blue states are sabotaging citizens nationwide
  • Karmelo Anthony Not Getting Do-Over In Murder Case
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Donald Trump posts on Truth Social August 22 2026
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Donald Trump posts on Truth Social August 22 2026

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.