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Tag: Thank You

WHITECHAPEL Bravely Announces They’re Still Playing Music in 2025, Will Subject U.S. to ‘Hymns In Dissonance’ in Its Entirety
Breaking

WHITECHAPEL Bravely Announces They’re Still Playing Music in 2025, Will Subject U.S. to ‘Hymns In Dissonance’ in Its Entirety

Chord F. DiscordMay 27, 2025May 27, 2025

Alright, metalheads (and those who accidentally clicked on this link thinking it was a recipe for vegan cupcakes 🧁), buckle…

Lou Koller FINALLY Admits He’s Not Dying (For Now)
Breaking

Lou Koller FINALLY Admits He’s Not Dying (For Now)

Chord F. DiscordMay 20, 2025May 21, 2025

Alright, listen up, ya bunch of whiny internet trolls! Lou Koller, the screechy frontman of those geriatric hardcore legends, SICK…

Scarlett Johansson and Miles Teller: Single-Handedly Rescuing Cinema (Probably Not) in ‘Paper Tiger’
Breaking

Scarlett Johansson and Miles Teller: Single-Handedly Rescuing Cinema (Probably Not) in ‘Paper Tiger’

FinnMay 15, 2025May 15, 2025

OMG, Hollywood’s recycling again! 🙄 Apparently, Anne Hathaway and Jeremy Strong were too busy method-acting their grocery lists to slum…

Oh wow, Linkin Park dropped a visualizer for “Unshatter,” because clearly we needed *more* shiny things to distract us from the void 🙄✨.
Breaking

Oh wow, Linkin Park dropped a visualizer for “Unshatter,” because clearly we needed *more* shiny things to distract us from the void 🙄✨.

Chord F. DiscordApril 25, 2025April 25, 2025

OMG, Linkin Park dropped a “visualizer” for “Unshatter”! 🙄 As if anyone actually *watches* those things. It’s basically a screensaver…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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