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Tag: Woke

Target decides to play Hunger Games with its employees, May the Odds be ever in your favor
Elephant Reads CNN

Target decides to play Hunger Games with its employees, May the Odds be ever in your favor

Big ElephantOctober 23, 2025October 23, 2025

Target, the woke retailer that went belly-up after pandering to the radical left, is FINALLY facing the consequences! Guess diversity…

Microsoft AI Overlord: Surrender Your Children, Peasants, Our AI Babysitter Has Arrived
Elephant Reads CNN

Microsoft AI Overlord: Surrender Your Children, Peasants, Our AI Babysitter Has Arrived

Big ElephantOctober 23, 2025October 23, 2025

Oh, the horror! The woke mind virus has infected our computers! These so-called “AI Chatbots” are now trying to replace…

Oops! Co-Pilot Tried To Save the Day, Plane Goes “Weeeee!” Off Runway
Elephant Reads CNN

Oops! Co-Pilot Tried To Save the Day, Plane Goes “Weeeee!” Off Runway

Big ElephantOctober 23, 2025October 23, 2025

Another day, another near-miss thanks to woke pilots probably distracted by their pronouns! This Roanoke, Virginia flight crew had a…

Trump Whines He Can’t Afford New Gold-Plated Toilet, Sues Biden for $230M
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Whines He Can’t Afford New Gold-Plated Toilet, Sues Biden for $230M

Big ElephantOctober 23, 2025October 23, 2025

Here we go again with the Fake News CNN trying to smear our glorious President Trump! They’re clutching their pearls…

Glacier-chasing yachts for clueless tourists, pink ribbons for profit, and pointless step counting: Read our groundbreaking news
Elephant Reads CNN

Glacier-chasing yachts for clueless tourists, pink ribbons for profit, and pointless step counting: Read our groundbreaking news

Big ElephantOctober 23, 2025October 23, 2025

👋 Welcome to 5 Things PM! More like 5 Ways the Liberal Media is Trying to Brainwash You! They want…

U.S. Military Accidentally-on-Purpose Sinks Boat in Pacific, Citing “War on Drugs” as Excuse
Elephant Reads CNN

U.S. Military Accidentally-on-Purpose Sinks Boat in Pacific, Citing “War on Drugs” as Excuse

Big ElephantOctober 22, 2025October 22, 2025

Another win for President Trump! SecDef Hegseth just vaporized some narco-terrorists in the Pacific! These losers thought they could bring…

UN blames cutting welfare for making the right wing extra spicy, says CNN Business (lol)
Elephant Reads CNN

UN blames cutting welfare for making the right wing extra spicy, says CNN Business (lol)

Big ElephantOctober 22, 2025October 22, 2025

Oh, the horror! The UN, that bastion of anti-Americanism and globalist garbage, is whining that cuts to social programs are…

Portugal’s FM Bravely Defends Recognizing Palestine (Because Who Needs Actual Problems, Right?)
Elephant Reads CNN

Portugal’s FM Bravely Defends Recognizing Palestine (Because Who Needs Actual Problems, Right?)

Big ElephantOctober 22, 2025October 22, 2025

Another day, another European country bowing to the woke mob and their terrorist-loving agenda! Portugal, led by their virtue-signaling Foreign…

CVS down, prescriptions grounded, public in shambles
Elephant Reads CNN

CVS down, prescriptions grounded, public in shambles

Big ElephantOctober 21, 2025October 21, 2025

Folks, can you believe this? CVS, another victim of the Woke Cloud! You know, the one Hillary Clinton probably set…

Oops! The Internet Broke Again: WTF Is Going On? | CNN Business
Elephant Reads CNN

Oops! The Internet Broke Again: WTF Is Going On? | CNN Business

Big ElephantOctober 20, 2025October 20, 2025

Ah, yes, another “unexplained” internet outage. You know, the kind that ALWAYS seems to happen when conservatives start exposing the…

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