Jack Smith Drops Election Interference Case Against Trump
Read MoreThe OnionSpecial Counsel Jack Smith requested that all federal charges be dropped against President-elect Trump over his alleged efforts…
Day: November 26, 2024
9 Things Public Schools Won’t Tell You About The First Thanksgiving
It’s Thanksgiving week, which brings back memories of what you learned in school about the first Thanksgiving, where pilgrim settlers…
12-Year-Old Jesus Amazes Temple Teachers By Completing Cracker Barrel Peg Game On First Try
JERUSALEM — The temple scribes and teachers were left in dumbfounded awe as a young boy from Nazareth named Jesus…
🚨 Captain America: Brave New World Faces a Major Meltdown: Reshoots, Budget Blunders, and Unwanted Superheroes! 🤦♂️
So, the latest Captain America flick is turning out to be something of a delightful disaster. Marvel Studios, the self-proclaimed gods of the superhero…
Trump Announces Plan To Deport 5,000 Illegal Immigrants In One Pre-Owned Honda Civic Hatchback
PALM BEACH, FL — As the public awaited the changes that come along with the transition to a new presidential…
Report: Kamala’s 2028 Campaign Already $700 Million In Debt
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Vice President Kamala Harris’s potential second attempt at the White House hit a disappointing obstacle this week,…
Barron Trump Returns Home To Find Melania Converted Room To Unending Labyrinth Of Darkness
Read MoreThe OnionPALM BEACH, FL—Sighing as he pulled on the head of a gargoyle while searching for a secret entrance…
Gregorian Monks Now Offer Second Sunday Service With Upbeat Contemporary Chants
STEUBENVILLE, OH — Modern-minded parishioners of St. Peter’s, a church connected to a Benedictine monastery, were pleased to hear that…
Trump Proposes 25 Percent Tariff On Imports From California
PALM BEACH, FL — President-elect Donald Trump officially announced that he plans to impose a 25% tariff on all imports…
Fallopian Tube
Read MoreThe OnionWho says ectopic pregnancy has to be a bad thing? Pending a medically necessary eviction, this luxurious short-term…