WASHINGTON—Stressing that he was prepared to remain in the role for as long as necessary, President Donald Trump claimed Monday that he would marry Venezuelan first lady Cilia Adela Flores de Maduro. “Until we can find a suitable long-term replacement, I’ll be married to Mrs. Maduro,” Trump said in a news conference in which he repeatedly insisted his position as Flores de Maduro’s temporary spouse would not interfere with his current obligations to Melania Trump. “Cilia is a woman with tremendous potential who’s been hampered for too long because of a corrupt and illegitimate husband. So I’m going to step in as her dearly beloved for the foreseeable future while we figure out a way to give her a proper wedding day.” Trump added that his planned honeymoon with the Venezuelan first lady would not cost the American taxpayer “a single cent” because of the involvement of domestic oil companies.
The post Trump Claims He Will Marry Maduro’s Wife Until Suitable Replacement Found appeared first on The Onion.
WASHINGTON—Stressing that he was prepared to remain in the role for as long as necessary, President Donald Trump claimed Monday that he would marry Venezuelan first lady Cilia Adela Flores de Maduro. “Until we can find a suitable long-term replacement, I’ll be married to Mrs. Maduro,” Trump said in a news conference in which he repeatedly
The post Trump Claims He Will Marry Maduro’s Wife Until Suitable Replacement Found appeared first on The Onion. Read More
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.