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Day: January 14, 2026

NASA’s Bureaucratic Sleepover (Town Hall)
Events

NASA’s Bureaucratic Sleepover (Town Hall)

Chuck B. BallsyJanuary 14, 2026

🚀 NASA’s “Small Business Town Hall” is basically a Space Job Fair for People Who Like Rockets and Red Tape!…

Health Connector Open Enrollment: Don’t Be An Idiot And Let The Deadline Screw You Over
Events

Health Connector Open Enrollment: Don’t Be An Idiot And Let The Deadline Screw You Over

Chuck B. BallsyJanuary 14, 2026

Another “Health Connector” webinar has officially ended, folks. You missed it. On Wednesday, Jan 14 from 5 pm to 6…

John 5 Claims Vince Neil Sang Something During Mötley Crüe’s 2025 Las Vegas Residency
Breaking, Music News

John 5 Claims Vince Neil Sang Something During Mötley Crüe’s 2025 Las Vegas Residency

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 14, 2026January 14, 2026

Behold, the Glorious Return of the Motley Crüe Time Machine: Because 2026 Needs More Spandex and “Theatrical” Rock! 🎸 In…

Epstein survivors ask inspector general to review Justice Department’s release of files | CNN Politics
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Epstein survivors ask inspector general to review Justice Department’s release of files | CNN Politics

Big ElephantJanuary 14, 2026January 14, 2026

Deep State Sabotage! Epstein File Release Under Siege by Democrats and Globalist Bots! The Swamp is fighting back, folks! As…

‘God of War’ TV Series Finally Finds Someone Angry Enough to Play Kratos (It’s Some Dude From ‘The Santa Clarita Diet’)
Breaking, Games News, Movie News

‘God of War’ TV Series Finally Finds Someone Angry Enough to Play Kratos (It’s Some Dude From ‘The Santa Clarita Diet’)

FinnJanuary 14, 2026January 14, 2026

🚨 BREAKING NEWS: It only took them the entire Age of the Ancients, a few cycles of Ragnarok, and probably…

Elon Musk’s Grok Chills Out After Generating Images of You-Know-Who and Pissing Off the Internet
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Elon Musk’s Grok Chills Out After Generating Images of You-Know-Who and Pissing Off the Internet

Big ElephantJanuary 14, 2026January 14, 2026

Elon Musk’s MAGA-Powered Grok AI Fights Back Against the Woke Censorship Mob! Meanwhile, Deranged Democrats Launch Yet Another Witch Hunt…

Marvel Rivals Launches Global Pro League Because Apparently 50 Million Players Wasn’t Enough Proof This Game Rocks
Breaking, Movie News

Marvel Rivals Launches Global Pro League Because Apparently 50 Million Players Wasn’t Enough Proof This Game Rocks

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 14, 2026January 14, 2026

Behold, the glorious dawn of a new era where Marvel characters engage in the ultimate virtual fistfight for our amusement!…

Babylon Bee

Democrats Respond To RFK With New Food Pentagram

FinnJanuary 14, 2026

    WASHINGTON, D.C. — In response to the new food pyramid released Robert F. Kennedy Jr., Democrats have released an…

Psycho Scientists Invent Monday Misery Just to Sell You Overpriced Wellness Crap
Events

Psycho Scientists Invent Monday Misery Just to Sell You Overpriced Wellness Crap

Chuck B. BallsyJanuary 14, 2026

Join Andrea for the “Blue Monday Boost” webinar at 12:00 PM EST on January 20, 2025, via Zoom. Experts claim…

Babylon Bee

Bill Clinton Says He’ll Gladly Testify On Epstein Case Just As Soon He Gets Back From This Cool Island

FinnJanuary 14, 2026

    NEW YORK, NY — According to filings to the Federal Court of the southern district of New York, former…

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  • Get Ready for Some Pretentious Discussions About Magnifica Humanitas That Will Change Your Life Forever Possibly Maybe
  • ResBaz Because Adulting with Your Research Data is Hard

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
January 2026
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