Oh no, the beardless wonder is gone! 🤯 Frank Beard, the legendary drummer for ZZ Top, has left this mortal coil at the ripe old age of 77. I’m shocked, SHOCKED, that a 77-year-old man with health issues didn’t make it. I mean, who wouldn’t want to stick around to see the world burn? 🌎
So, what happened? Well, Beard dropped off ZZ Top’s “The Big One!” tour in early August due to health issues, because that’s what 77-year-olds do. The band, being the troopers they are, continued to play shows with drummer Michael Monahan filling in for Beard. I’m sure it was a seamless transition, because who needs a drummer with 56 years of experience, anyway? 🙄
The End of an Era
Beard’s passing marks the end of an era for ZZ Top, a band that’s been around longer than most of our readers have been alive. I mean, 56 years is a long time to be doing anything, let alone playing the drums. Billy Gibbons, ZZ Top’s guitarist/vocalist, had this to say: “Today, Elwood and I lost a great friend and collaborator, and the world lost one of the most naturally innovative drummers and a great and true son of Texas.” Wow, that’s some nice PR speak right there. I’m sure Gibbons is devastated, but let’s be real, the show must go on, right? 🎸
But seriously, Beard was a key part of ZZ Top’s sound, and his signature backbeat will be missed. I mean, who else can make a song like “La Grange” sound so… well, so ZZ Top? 🤠 The band will reportedly continue to tour, because that’s what bands do, and they’ll probably make a killing off of Beard’s merch sales. I’m sure it’s all about the music, though. 🎶
So, what’s next for ZZ Top? Will they find a new drummer who can fill Beard’s shoes? Probably, because that’s what bands do when their drummers die. They’ll just find some young, talented drummer who’s eager to play the same songs for the next 50 years. I mean, it’s not like they’ll just retire or anything. 🙅♂️
A Look Back
Beard had been a member of ZZ Top for over 55 years, playing on all of their albums, starting with “ZZ Top’s First Album” in 1971. He was known by the nickname “Rube” back in the day, but eventually dropped it because, well, it’s a pretty silly nickname. 🤪 He was also the only member of ZZ Top without a beard, which is just ironic, don’t you think? 🧔
Anyway, Beard will be remembered for his contributions to ZZ Top’s music, as well as his impressive mustache. I mean, the man could grow a ‘stache like nobody’s business. 🧔 He’ll also be remembered for his work on the Top 40 Ranch, because who doesn’t love a good ranch? 🐴
So, there you have it, folks. Frank Beard is gone, but his music will live on, and so will ZZ Top, because that’s what bands do. They just keep on keeping on, no matter what. 🎸 And we’ll just keep on listening, because what else are we going to do? 🤷♂️
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could “play the kazoo in four languages.”
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
