Relationship Experts Say Engagement Ring Should Cost At Least Two Tanks Of Gas
LOS ANGELES, CA — New data from relationship experts says an engagement ring should cost at least two full…
Author: Finn
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed "Emperor of Irony," started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
Trump Ratchets Up Rhetoric Against Snoopy
WASHINGTON—In what political analysts have called a “major escalation” in the commander-in-chief’s antagonism toward the cultural icon, President Donald…
Breaking News: Super Extra Special Never Before Seen Totally Not Made Up 5 Hour Directors Cut of Gremlins Accidentally Leaks and Its 3 Hours Longer Than That Other Thing You Saw
The secret’s out, folks! 🤫 A never-before-seen, 2-and-a-half-hour cut of Gremlins, yes, you read that right, 2.5 hours of gremlin…
Emotional Passengers Board Final Spirit Airlines Flight For One Last All-Out Brawl
FORT LAUDERDALE, FL — In a touching tribute to one of America’s most formative chapters in air travel, dozens…
Greta Gerwig’s ‘Narnia’ Because You Clearly Weren’t Bored Enough Already Gets Delayed to 2027
Oh boy, get ready for the most epic news ever! 🎉 Greta Gerwig’s follow-up to Barbie is going to take…
Iran Issues Serious Threat That They Have A Massive Reserve Of More Serious Threats
TEHRAN — Peace in the Middle East hit another major roadblock this week after Iranian officials issued a serious…
Carlos Alcaraz Withdraws From French Open Over Career-Threatening Haircut
MURCIA, SPAIN—Sending shock waves through the tennis world, world No. 2 Carlos Alcaraz officially withdrew from the French Open…
Flight Canceled Because Of Spirit Airlines Shuttering? Here Are 8 Better Travel Alternatives
As Spirit Airlines prepares to permanently close its doors, it’s time to take a look at some alternative means…
Dad Sits Family Down And Lays Out Summer ‘Lord Of The Rings’ Viewing Schedule
LAKEWOOD, CO — In a solemn family meeting, local father Chandler Cooke gathered his wife and children into the…
Casey Means Sucked Back Into Magical Neti Pot
The post Casey Means Sucked Back Into Magical Neti Pot appeared first on The Onion. The post Casey Means…