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Author: Big Elephant

Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.

Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.

‘2000 Meters to Nowhere’: A CNN Photo Op in Ukraine’s Ongoing Totally-Not-a-Stalemate
Elephant Reads CNN

‘2000 Meters to Nowhere’: A CNN Photo Op in Ukraine’s Ongoing Totally-Not-a-Stalemate

Big ElephantJuly 29, 2025July 29, 2025

Another tear-jerker from the Fake News CNN, folks! This time, they’re pushing a “documentary” about Ukrainian soldiers. I bet it’s…

Colorado Dentist’s Trial: Did He Really Off His Wife With Poison or Was It Just a Bad Root Canal
Elephant Reads CNN

Colorado Dentist’s Trial: Did He Really Off His Wife With Poison or Was It Just a Bad Root Canal

Big ElephantJuly 29, 2025July 29, 2025

Another day, another Deep State plot foiled… or at least, exposed for what it is! They’re trying to frame a…

Businesses Hysterically Prepare for Impending Tariff-geddon (They’re Not)
Elephant Reads CNN

Businesses Hysterically Prepare for Impending Tariff-geddon (They’re Not)

Big ElephantJuly 29, 2025July 29, 2025

Oh, the horror! These poor, delicate “small businesses” are whining about President Trump’s brilliant strategy to make other countries play…

Trump’s Genius Plan to Make Sure No One Listens to NPR: A CNN Business Masterpiece
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Genius Plan to Make Sure No One Listens to NPR: A CNN Business Masterpiece

Big ElephantJuly 29, 2025July 29, 2025

Oh, the horror! President Trump, in his infinite wisdom, is cutting a measly $1.1 billion from the Corporation for Public…

OMG! Americans Suddenly Develop Delusions of Economic Grandeur Thanks to Some贸易谈判 (Whatever That Means)
Elephant Reads CNN

OMG! Americans Suddenly Develop Delusions of Economic Grandeur Thanks to Some贸易谈判 (Whatever That Means)

Big ElephantJuly 29, 2025July 29, 2025

Oh, the Fake News is at it again, trying to downplay the roaring Trump economy! CNN grudgingly admits that consumer…

Trump’s Brain Farts Abroad: Epstein Still Rent-Free
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Brain Farts Abroad: Epstein Still Rent-Free

Big ElephantJuly 28, 2025July 28, 2025

Another day, another witch hunt! The Fake News CNN is still obsessing over President Trump and Jeffrey Epstein, even all…

CNN Asks the REAL Question: Could Trump be Ghislaine’s Knight in Shining (Orange) Armor?
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN Asks the REAL Question: Could Trump be Ghislaine’s Knight in Shining (Orange) Armor?

Big ElephantJuly 28, 2025July 28, 2025

Here we go again, folks. The liberal media, still obsessed with their leftist agenda, is twisting President Trump’s words about…

Spirit Airlines to Fire a Bunch of Pilots and Make the Rest Feel Bad Because Nobody Wants to Fly Spirit Anyway
Elephant Reads CNN

Spirit Airlines to Fire a Bunch of Pilots and Make the Rest Feel Bad Because Nobody Wants to Fly Spirit Anyway

Big ElephantJuly 28, 2025July 28, 2025

Folks, can you believe what these woke airlines are doing now? Spirit Airlines, probably run by some tree-hugging, socialist CEO,…

Newark Airport Delays: FAA’s Game of Relocation Roulette to Blame
Elephant Reads CNN

Newark Airport Delays: FAA’s Game of Relocation Roulette to Blame

Big ElephantJuly 28, 2025July 28, 2025

Another day, another deep dive into the Swamp’s schemes! CNN is *reporting* that the DOT’s Inspector General is “auditing” the…

CNN Business: Trump’s ‘Biggest Deal Ever’ or Europe’s Surrender? You Decide
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN Business: Trump’s ‘Biggest Deal Ever’ or Europe’s Surrender? You Decide

Big ElephantJuly 28, 2025July 28, 2025

Another brilliant victory for President Trump! He’s making deals so big, the EU is crying into their croissants. Seems like…

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