Iceberger King
Read MoreThe OnionThe post Iceberger King appeared first on The Onion. FinnFinn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of…
Category: The Onion
Horrified Woman Swears Off Ambien After Seeing Number Of Library Books She Reserved Last Night
Read MoreThe OnionCOLUMBUS, OH—Reeling as she took stock of the damage done in her debilitated state, area woman Brittany Marino…
Trump Cutbacks Force FAA To Unplug Giant Magnet That Keeps Planes In Air
Read MoreThe OnionWASHINGTON—With thousands of aircraft suddenly falling out of the sky after the power was turned off, President Donald…
CIA Announces It Has Obtained The Briefcase
Read MoreThe OnionThe post CIA Announces It Has Obtained The Briefcase appeared first on The Onion. FinnFinn McFrame, celebrated satirical…
Numerous Teams Express Interest In Aaron Rodgers Playing Elsewhere
Read MoreThe OnionNEW YORK—Leaping at the opportunity to make their intentions clear, numerous NFL front offices expressed interest this week…
Drunk Man Doesn’t Like The Way Kumon Logo Looking At Him
Read MoreThe OnionCHICAGO—Charging across the street in order to find out “what this motherfucker’s problem is,” local drunk man Garrett…
It Almost Weirder That Grown Man On Roblox Isn’t Grooming Children
Read MoreThe OnionSEATTLE—Voicing concern about the adult’s aberrant behavior, sources confirmed Monday that it was almost weirder that Richard Shea,…
Igloo Recalls Coolers Over Finger Amputation Risk
Read MoreThe OnionIgloo is recalling more than 1 million of its coolers following reports that a handle issue led to…
Joann Fabrics Announces Plans To Make Mishmash Store Out Of Shuttered Locations’ Scraps
Read MoreThe OnionThe post Joann Fabrics Announces Plans To Make Mishmash Store Out Of Shuttered Locations’ Scraps appeared first on…
JD Vance Sets Out Little Heart-Covered Mailbox On Desk Just In Case
Read MoreThe OnionThe post JD Vance Sets Out Little Heart-Covered Mailbox On Desk Just In Case appeared first on The…