Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: crime

Boulder Hate Crime: Is This Guy Really That Hateful or Just Having a Bad Hair Day
Elephant Reads CNN

Boulder Hate Crime: Is This Guy Really That Hateful or Just Having a Bad Hair Day

Big ElephantJune 18, 2025June 18, 2025

Oh, the tolerant Left! Here we have Mohamed Sabry Soliman, an Egyptian national and illegal alien, who allegedly tried to…

NYC Comptroller Brad Lander Mistakenly Detained by ICE in Bizarre Courtroom Mix-Up, Proving Even Politicians Aren’t Safe From Bureaucratic Blunders
Elephant Reads CNN

NYC Comptroller Brad Lander Mistakenly Detained by ICE in Bizarre Courtroom Mix-Up, Proving Even Politicians Aren’t Safe From Bureaucratic Blunders

Big ElephantJune 17, 2025June 17, 2025

Another day, another Democrat pulling a stunt! NYC Comptroller and Mayoral wannabe Brad Lander got himself arrested, trying to obstruct…

California Bill: Now Cops Can’t Hide Their Disappointment After a Donut Runs Out
Elephant Reads CNN

California Bill: Now Cops Can’t Hide Their Disappointment After a Donut Runs Out

Big ElephantJune 17, 2025June 17, 2025

California is going full-blown Communist! Now they want to unmask our brave ICE officers, probably so the Antifa mob can…

MyPillow Guy Pilloried: Jury Says He Did a No-No to Voting Machine Dude
Elephant Reads CNN

MyPillow Guy Pilloried: Jury Says He Did a No-No to Voting Machine Dude

Big ElephantJune 16, 2025June 16, 2025

Another day, another victory for the Deep State! A Colorado jury, probably filled with soy-latte-sipping liberals, has decided that MyPillow’s…

Spectrum Blames Fiber Optic Outage on Mischievous Squirrels with a Vendetta Against Connectivity
Elephant Reads CNN

Spectrum Blames Fiber Optic Outage on Mischievous Squirrels with a Vendetta Against Connectivity

Big ElephantJune 15, 2025June 15, 2025

Oh, the horror! Spectrum cable lines in Los Angeles were cut. Vandalism, they say? I say it’s ANTIFA! Probably those…

‘The Adventures of Cliff Booth’ Adds Someone We’ll Probably Forget By Next Week
Breaking, Movie News

‘The Adventures of Cliff Booth’ Adds Someone We’ll Probably Forget By Next Week

FinnJune 15, 2025June 15, 2025

Oh, honey, hold onto your hats 👒 because the “surprise” sequel to Quentin Tarantino’s “Once Upon a Time… in Hollywood”…

CNN: Man trips, blames Trump
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN: Man trips, blames Trump

Big ElephantJune 12, 2025June 12, 2025

Another day, another Democrat meltdown! CNN is clutching its pearls because Trump’s DOJ is finally holding these lawless liberals accountable.…

Car Goes Zoom, Then Bang-Bang: Cops Win Again
Elephant Reads CNN

Car Goes Zoom, Then Bang-Bang: Cops Win Again

Big ElephantJune 11, 2025June 11, 2025

Another day, another crime in the once-great city of New York, now a liberal hellhole! A car chase, a shootout…

Jim Sheridan’s ‘Re-creation’: Finally, a chance to re-traumatize everyone with that Irish murder case
Breaking, Movie News

Jim Sheridan’s ‘Re-creation’: Finally, a chance to re-traumatize everyone with that Irish murder case

FinnJune 10, 2025June 10, 2025

Ah, Jim Sheridan, the guy who’s apparently been traumatized since the womb. 👶 According to him, his obsession with defending…

Mark Ruffalo, the Hulk himself, slumming it in a Sian Heder flick: ‘Being Heumann’
Breaking, Movie News

Mark Ruffalo, the Hulk himself, slumming it in a Sian Heder flick: ‘Being Heumann’

FinnJune 10, 2025June 10, 2025

Oh, great, another inspirational biopic! 🙄 Because what the world REALLY needs is more Hollywood patting itself on the back. Mark…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 34 35 36 37 Next

Latest posts

  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Mark Levin claims blue states are sabotaging citizens nationwide
  • Karmelo Anthony Not Getting Do-Over In Murder Case
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Donald Trump posts on Truth Social August 22 2026
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Donald Trump posts on Truth Social August 22 2026
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Donald Trump posts on Truth Social August 22 2026

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.