Luigi Mangione dodges lethal injection, judge says “nah fam, let’s not”
Yet Another Win for Woke Lunacy: Mangione Won’t Face Death Penalty for Murdering CEO Oh, look, folks! Another shining example…
Tag: prison
Treasury Clutches Pearls, Fires $21M ‘Oopsie Whoopsie’ Cannon at Booz Allen Over Trump’s Magically Appearing Tax Returns
Deep State Consulting Firm Finally Gets BUSTED After Plotting Greatest Tax Data Heist Against Patriot Trump! MAGA Justice Unleashed! Holy…
Legendary Extreme Metal Drummer NICK BARKER: ‘I Hope To Get A New Kidney Sometime Later This Year, And Maybe A New Cymbal’
Brace yourselves, drumming degenerates, because the metal beat-keeper himself, Nick Barker, is currently locked in a death match with his…
Brendan Banfield Expected to Testify in His Own Defense Because the Defense Rested and the Jury Looked Bored
FAIRFAX, VA – In a courtroom drama straight out of a Netflix series produced by a DEI committee, the trial…
MEGADETH Drops ‘Puppet Parade’ and Proves They Still Have Strings Attached to the 80s
🚨 BREAKING NEWS FROM THE THRASH GODS! 🚨 Dave Mustaine Has Officially Announced MEGADETH’s Final Album, and Yes, It Includes…
The Best New TV Shows on Streaming This Weekend (That Will Probably Suck But Here We Are)
🚨 BREAKING: Your Couch Just Got a Promotion! 🍿 New Shows Are Here to Haunt Your Binge-Watching Soul (and Your…
MAYHEM’s ATTILA CSIHAR Says He Wasn’t Even Mad When Euronymous Turned Into a Human Pizza
When Black Metal Wasn’t Just a Music Genre, But a Full-Time Contact Sport 🎸🔪 Ah, the early ’90s—back when Norwegian…
Word of the Week: When ‘Kinetic’ Means ‘We’re Blasting Stuff So Hard It Breaks Physics’
A HAIR-RAISING “KINETIC” ESCAPADE: TRUMP GOES FULL ACTION HERO AGAINST MADURO’S DRUG-DEALING, SOCIALIST DICTATORSHIP – BUT WHAT’S THE REAL STORY?</…
R&B Rooftop Brunch or How to Burn Calories While Pretending to Be a Grown-Up
🚨 ATTENTION HUMANS: The R&B Rooftop Party is happening again, because apparently, we didn’t learn our lesson last time. 🚨…
“One Last Time,” The Stranger Things Finale Trailer Suggests We Might Finally Get Some Answers (Or Just More Questions)
🚨 BREAKING NEWS: Netflix Just Dropped a Trailer That Proves We’re All Gonna Cry on New Year’s Eve 🚨 🎉😭🍿…