Read MoreThe OnionThe post Parents Completely Jacked 3 Months Into Retirement appeared first on The Onion.
Related Posts
A Message Of Hope From Global Tetrahedron
Read MoreThe OnionWe have taken another proud, collective stride toward dystopia. A bankruptcy court has denied the sale of InfoWars…
Jon M. Chu Defends Splitting ‘Wicked’ Into 230,400 Successive Images
Read MoreThe OnionLOS ANGELES—Making his case that the story of Elphaba and Glinda was too big for one picture, director…
‘The Harvest!’ Shrieks Forgetful Amish Guy
Read MoreThe OnionLANCASTER, PA—Leaping up from his rocking chair as the realization filled him with utter panic, forgetful Amish guy…