Norm! Dies! The World Ends! (Just Kidding, It’s Only George Wendt, 76, No Biggie)
Hold onto your barstools, folks, because the big man, the legend, the *Norm* himself, George Wendt, has apparently kicked the…
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AS I LAY DYING: The “We Swear We’re Not Still Canceled” European Tour 2025 (Maybe)
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because your favorite band of reformed (debatable) metalcore mayhem, AS I LAY DYING, is back! And…
Faithful Dog Refuses To Move From Spot Where He Killed Beloved Owner
Read MoreThe OnionMINNEAPOLIS—Moved by the animal’s unwavering devotion, sources confirmed Wednesday that local 4-year-old cocker spaniel Biscuit refused to move…
No Tax On Tips Passes Senate Unanimously After Clarification That Bribes Can Count As Tips
WASHINGTON, D.C. — IN a rare display of full bipartisan support, President Donald Trump’s “No Tax On Tips” bill passed…
OMG! Sega’s “Totally Original” Switch 2 Lineup: Prepare for Mind-Blowingly Predictable Hilarity
Oh. My. God. The Nintendo Switch 2 is REAL, you guys! And apparently, Sega, yes, *that* Sega, the one that…
Gavin Rossdale’s Lyrical Genius (Finally) Unveiled: ‘I Beat Loneliness’ (Probably)
Alright, buckle up, buttercups, because Gavin Rossdale from BUSH (yes, *that* BUSH) just dropped some profound wisdom on Baltimore’s 98…
DORO, Queen of Leather & Surprisingly Buoyant Seafaring Anthems, Drops New Banger This Friday (Prepare to Be Seasick)
Okay, so apparently the “Metal Queen” Doro Pesch (who?) is dropping a new single called “Warriors Of The Sea” this…
Lies of P: Overture – We Played It So You Don’t Have To (But You Will Anyway, You Pinocchio Simps)
When I first glimpsed the trailer for Lies of P: Overture, my reaction was a symphony of *meh*. Seriously, where’s…
