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Category: The Onion

Man Rides Disneyland Attraction 15,000 Times
The Onion

Man Rides Disneyland Attraction 15,000 Times

FinnDecember 11, 2025

       A Disney superfan celebrated his 15,000th ride on the Cars-themed Radiator Springs Racers at Disney California Adventure, having documented…

Trump Calls Groceries ‘A Hoax’ 
The Onion

Trump Calls Groceries ‘A Hoax’ 

FinnDecember 11, 2025

       MOUNT POCONO, PA—Delivering a highly anticipated speech about the state of the economy, President Donald Trump doubled down this…

Rubio Orders State Department Braille Signage Switch To ‘Times New Roman’
The Onion

Rubio Orders State Department Braille Signage Switch To ‘Times New Roman’

FinnDecember 11, 2025

       The post Rubio Orders State Department Braille Signage Switch To ‘Times New Roman’ appeared first on The Onion.    The…

Artist Profile: Katseye
The Onion

Artist Profile: Katseye

FinnDecember 11, 2025

       Girl group Katseye is nominated for two awards at the 2026 Grammys, including Best New Artist. The Onion shares…

Mom’s Eyes Roll Back In Head At Dinner Table As She Feeds On Family’s Enjoyment Of Food
The Onion

Mom’s Eyes Roll Back In Head At Dinner Table As She Feeds On Family’s Enjoyment Of Food

FinnDecember 11, 2025

       MARBLEHEAD, MA—Her body seizing with energy after hearing the request from her youngest son to pass the asparagus, local…

Golden Globes Introduces Best Podcast Category
The Onion

Golden Globes Introduces Best Podcast Category

FinnDecember 10, 2025

       The Golden Globe Awards announced the addition of a new best podcast category, with the inaugural nominees avoiding podcasts…

Study Finds Young People Now Watch More YouTube Content Than Zoetropes Of Galloping Horses
The Onion

Study Finds Young People Now Watch More YouTube Content Than Zoetropes Of Galloping Horses

FinnDecember 10, 2025

       LOS ANGELES—In a groundbreaking finding that reveals a major shift in media consumption habits, a new study published Wednesday…

Fabergé Egg Recovered After Being Swallowed By Thief
The Onion

Fabergé Egg Recovered After Being Swallowed By Thief

FinnDecember 9, 2025

       Police in New Zealand recovered a rare $19,000 Fabergé egg pendant swallowed by an alleged thief, with the pendant…

Man Humiliates Himself At Holiday Party By Telling Coworkers He Appreciates Them
The Onion

Man Humiliates Himself At Holiday Party By Telling Coworkers He Appreciates Them

FinnDecember 9, 2025

       CINCINNATI—Saying the man’s reputation was unlikely ever to recover from the embarrassment, sources confirmed Tuesday that local accountant Josh…

Hometown Unveils Disappointing Microbrewery
The Onion

Hometown Unveils Disappointing Microbrewery

FinnDecember 9, 2025

       BOERNE, TX—Providing an underwhelming new dining option for those returning to visit family in the area, people who grew…

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