Skip to content
logo4

Jackal.Today

News that makes you want to howl!

  • Home
  • Breaking
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Events
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
  • Games News
  • Sport News
  • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Advertise with us!
  • Editorial
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Disney

Marvel’s ‘Wonder Man’: More Like ‘Blunder Man,’ Am I Right
Breaking, Movie News

Marvel’s ‘Wonder Man’: More Like ‘Blunder Man,’ Am I Right

Finn McFrameJuly 8, 2025July 8, 2025

Oh boy, buckle up buttercups 🪑, because Marvel’s dredging up another hero from the depths of comic book obscurity! Wonder…

Marvel’s New X-Men Reboot to Star Bella Ramsey as Potato-Man — Fans Are Losing It
X-Men Go Full Woke: Genderfluid Vegetables, Inclusivity, and Bella Ramsey in Latex
Movie News

Marvel’s New X-Men Reboot to Star Bella Ramsey as Potato-Man — Fans Are Losing It

Finn McFrameJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

A deeply concerned insider hiding behind the soundstage curtains at Disney has leaked shocking news: the upcoming reboot of the…

Disney Lorcana Crowns Some Lucky Schmuck World Champion
Breaking, Games News

Disney Lorcana Crowns Some Lucky Schmuck World Champion

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 5, 2025July 5, 2025

Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! The Great Mouse himself has apparently sprinkled enough fairy dust (or maybe just corporate…

Netflix Vomits Out Another “Best” Animated Movie (Yeah, Right)
Breaking, Movie News

Netflix Vomits Out Another “Best” Animated Movie (Yeah, Right)

Finn McFrameJuly 4, 2025July 4, 2025

Okay, so apparently it’s been a real snoozefest for animated movies this year 😴. I mean, who even cares about…

‘Crimson Tide 2: Electric Boogaloo’ Incoming
Breaking, Movie News

‘Crimson Tide 2: Electric Boogaloo’ Incoming

Finn McFrameJuly 3, 2025July 3, 2025

Oh, sweet Neptune’s beard! 🧜‍♂️ Jerry Bruckheimer, bless his octogenarian heart, is apparently smoking something stronger than sea kelp and…

The Bear Gets Another Season: Disney+ Milking It For All It’s Worth
Breaking, Movie News

The Bear Gets Another Season: Disney+ Milking It For All It’s Worth

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 2, 2025July 2, 2025

Oh, sweet baby Carmy! 🐻🔪 FX just HAD to announce that The Bear is getting a fifth season. Like we…

Hollywood’s Back, Baby: 2025 Box Office Proves Summer Blockbusters Aren’t Quite Dead (Yet)
Elephant Reads CNN

Hollywood’s Back, Baby: 2025 Box Office Proves Summer Blockbusters Aren’t Quite Dead (Yet)

Big ElephantJune 22, 2025June 22, 2025

Hollywood is BACK, baby! Or at least, that’s what the liberal media wants you to think. After years of pushing…

‘How to Train Your Dragon’ Actually Made Money, Shocker
Breaking, Movie News

‘How to Train Your Dragon’ Actually Made Money, Shocker

Finn McFrameJune 17, 2025June 17, 2025

Oh, look, another soulless live-action remake nobody asked for! 🙄 Yes, friends, ‘How to Train Your Dragon’ is back, and…

Peter Sohn to Direct Pixar’s ‘Incredibles 3’: Get Ready for Disappointment, Folks
Breaking, Movie News

Peter Sohn to Direct Pixar’s ‘Incredibles 3’: Get Ready for Disappointment, Folks

Finn McFrameJune 16, 2025June 16, 2025

OMG, get ready to have your minds BLOWN 🤯! “Incredibles 3” is CONFIRMED! But wait, there’s a twist! Brad Bird,…

Ozzy’s Gone Walkabout Again, Hasn’t He? A ‘Seek-And-Find’ Book for the Terminally Bored
Breaking, Music News

Ozzy’s Gone Walkabout Again, Hasn’t He? A ‘Seek-And-Find’ Book for the Terminally Bored

Chord F. DiscordJune 16, 2025June 16, 2025

Los Angeles-based animation studio and book publisher Fantoons (who?) has announced the upcoming book “Where Is Ozzy?”, because apparently, we…

Posts pagination

1 2 … 4 Next

Most Viewed Posts

  • Are You Sure This Is Linkin Park? Fans Claim New Song Sounds Like Paramore! 🎸 (1,415)
  • 😱 New Days of Thunder Sequel Set to Drive Woke Hollywood Wild! 🏁💥 (1,402)
  • Yoda Goes Black, Chewbacca’s New Pronouns: Lucasfilm’s Wild Plans for Star Wars 😱🌟 (1,343)
  • 🎮 BioWare’s «Mancleaners» and the New Woman Effect: A Look Inside the Studio’s Gender Revolution 💼 (1,165)
  • New Polls Show That Trump Will Definitely Win Unless Harris Wins (975)

Latest posts

  • K.K. Downing’s Back! (And Apparently Metal Depended On It)
  • DOGE’s Boneheaded Budget: Senate Showdown or Puppy Pile-Up? | CNN Politics
  • Elon’s Chatbot Just Went Full Nazi, LOL
  • Hegseth Goes Rogue, Pulls a Fast One on Biden With Ukraine Weaponry, Sources Say
  • Team Clout’s ILL features trans monster Dylan Mulvaney that blinds you with wnderwear

Archives

  • July 2025
  • June 2025
  • May 2025
  • April 2025
  • March 2025
  • February 2025
  • January 2025
  • December 2024
  • November 2024
  • October 2024
  • July 2024
  1. CirrusFlash on Oh great, another overpriced ski simulator nobody asked for is getting a shiny new trailer and a collector’s edition, whoop-de-doo 🙄 ⛷️ 👻 💰.April 25, 2025

    Another celebrity podcast? Can\'t wait to authenticity.

  2. canary apple red on HBO Bends the Knee to Rowling: Trans Rights? Apparently Not as Magical as Galleons! 🤑April 25, 2025

    Another celebrity podcast? Can\'t wait to Ryan.

  3. Bleach on 🛒Amazon Takes Full Control of 007: James Bond Gears Up for the Battle of Likes and Discounts🎬April 25, 2025

    The Met Gala theme this year: \'millionaires but make it expensive.\'

  4. Crazy Eights on Oblivion Remaster: ‘Body Type’ vs ‘Gender’ – Who Won This Clown Show? 🤡🎉April 25, 2025

    Another celebrity podcast? Can\'t wait to 5000.

  5. Sleek Assassin on 🤠 Amazon Reinvents Mass Effect: Forget the Reapers, Meet Galactic Two-Day Shipping!April 25, 2025

    Award shows: where sponsored hand each other trophies for existing.

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn McFrame October 8, 2024
Editorial
! Editorial strike2
Editorial

🔥 Jackal.Today Journalists Go on Strike: «Too Much Money, Too Much Freedom — Enough Is Enough!»

Finn McFrame January 29, 2025
July 2025
M T W T F S S
 123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
28293031  
« Jun    
Copyright © 2025 Jackal.Today | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}