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Tag: Michael

Flea’s Solo Album Dropping in 2026 – Get Ready to Wait, Pepper Heads
Breaking, Music News

Flea’s Solo Album Dropping in 2026 – Get Ready to Wait, Pepper Heads

Chord F. DiscordDecember 3, 2025December 3, 2025

After five glorious decades of slapping the bass 🎸 in the RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS (because, let’s face it, that’s…

Wolfie Plays All The Instruments Himself Because Apparently He Doesn’t Trust Anyone Else In The World
Breaking, Music News

Wolfie Plays All The Instruments Himself Because Apparently He Doesn’t Trust Anyone Else In The World

Chord F. DiscordNovember 29, 2025November 29, 2025

In a new interview with Cutter’s Rockcast, So, apparently, this dude Wolfgang Van Halen, the mastermind behind MAMMOTH WVH, thinks…

HELLOWEEN Cancels Asian Tour Because Michael Kiske Ate Too Much Wasabi
Breaking, Music News

HELLOWEEN Cancels Asian Tour Because Michael Kiske Ate Too Much Wasabi

Chord F. DiscordNovember 27, 2025November 27, 2025

OMG! 🎃 Seems like those geriatric German power metallers 🤘 from HELLOWEEN 🧙‍♀️ have had to CANCEL their eagerly (not…

John Lilly and His Earth Coincidence Control Office Screening (As If Anyone Cares)
Events

John Lilly and His Earth Coincidence Control Office Screening (As If Anyone Cares)

Chuck B. BallsyNovember 24, 2025

**OMG! 🙄 Prepare for JOHN LILLY AND THE EARTH COINCIDENCE CONTROL OFFICE (2025)! 7th House, Bibliomancers, & Los Angeles Filmforum…

“The Chronology of Water” Trailer: Witness Kristen Stewart Direct Imogen Poots (and Probably Overthink It)
Breaking, Movie News

“The Chronology of Water” Trailer: Witness Kristen Stewart Direct Imogen Poots (and Probably Overthink It)

FinnNovember 22, 2025November 22, 2025

Oh, sweet baby Jesus, another artsy-fartsy film nobody asked for! The Chronology of Water, a cinematic masterpiece (according to who,…

Maxxie LaWow Does Cartoons and Drag, What Could Go Wrong
Events

Maxxie LaWow Does Cartoons and Drag, What Could Go Wrong

Chuck B. BallsyNovember 22, 2025

**Simon 🙄, a barista, gets a wig 🤣 & becomes Maxxie LaWow! She must save her town from Dyna Bolical…

Florida Eviction Party Gets a Tad Too Wild: Deputy Down, Shooter and Friends Feeling Kinda Owchie
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Florida Eviction Party Gets a Tad Too Wild: Deputy Down, Shooter and Friends Feeling Kinda Owchie

Big ElephantNovember 21, 2025November 21, 2025

Another Day, Another Socialist Snowflake Meltdown! A Florida sheriff’s deputy, a true American hero, was KILLED while serving an eviction…

Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Brain Exploded When They Tried to Reboot ‘Total Recall’ (Spoiler: It Was a Total Fail)
Breaking, Movie News

Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Brain Exploded When They Tried to Reboot ‘Total Recall’ (Spoiler: It Was a Total Fail)

FinnNovember 21, 2025November 21, 2025

OMG, you guys! 🙄 Arnold Schwarzenegger, the guy who peaked in the ’80s and ’90s (no offense, Arnie ❤️), has…

Boogie Nights in 4K: Because You Haven’t Seen Enough Fake Penises
Breaking, Movie News

Boogie Nights in 4K: Because You Haven’t Seen Enough Fake Penises

FinnNovember 20, 2025November 20, 2025

Wow, hold onto your hats, folks! Boogie Nights, that cinematic masterpiece (or, you know, just a movie) from 1997 by…

Behold! The POWER OF 3 Supergroup (AKA Orianthi and Some Other Ladies) Shreds at Raiders-Cowboys Game
Breaking, Music News

Behold! The POWER OF 3 Supergroup (AKA Orianthi and Some Other Ladies) Shreds at Raiders-Cowboys Game

Chord F. DiscordNovember 19, 2025November 19, 2025

Behold! THE POWER OF 3, the earth-shattering, mind-blowing (not really) supergroup comprised of Orianthi, the guitar-slinging singer-songwriter who once brushed…

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Latest posts

  • How to Deal with Your Kid’s Over the Top Public Displays of Affection Without Losing Your Mind
  • TOM KEIFER Still Singing Cinderella Songs Because You Wont Let Him Retire
  • BREAKING ORANGE ORACLE DROPS BOMBSHELL TRUMP CONQUERS LATIN AMERICA
  • SKILLET To Finally Release Something New Because You’ve All Been Clamoring For More Of The Same Old Stuff In July; ‘Comatose: 20 Years, Still Screaming Tour’ To Launch This Fall Because They Still Can’t Sell Out A Decent Venue
  • Trump vows to punish scum who trashed our great nation’s pool

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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