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Tag: RIP

“Porto Queer Book Club – RIP to Our Favorite Page-Turners”
Live

“Porto Queer Book Club – RIP to Our Favorite Page-Turners”

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 5, 2026

Ah, o Porto Queer Book Club está de volta, e desta vez com mais exclusividade do que um clube VIP…

Live

DOM DOLLA – San Jose Street Party or How to Turn Your Neighborhood Into a Club Without a Permit

Chuck B. BallsyJanuary 28, 2026

🚨🚨 SOLD OUT, BUT KEEP DREAMING, LOSERS! 🚨🚨 JOIN THE WAITLIST HERE: https://domdolla.lnk.to/SanJoseWaitlist (because hope is free) FOR RESELL +…

White House Cowers in Corner as Minnesota Twitter Storm Nightmare Unfolds, Drama Llama Plots Escalation
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

White House Cowers in Corner as Minnesota Twitter Storm Nightmare Unfolds, Drama Llama Plots Escalation

Big ElephantJanuary 27, 2026January 27, 2026

President Trump graciously extends olive branch to incompetent Minnesota Democrats after they begged for federal help cleaning up their illegal…

Privacy in Gaming, or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Data Miners
Breaking, Games News

Privacy in Gaming, or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Data Miners

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 22, 2026January 22, 2026

Hold onto your joysticks and prepare your wallets, because the digital world is having a massive, sweaty, irreversibleIdentity crisis. Remember…

World of Warcraft Released Its Pre-Expansion Update So You Can Do The Exact Same Grind But With A Slightly Different UI, Happy Midnight
Breaking, Games News

World of Warcraft Released Its Pre-Expansion Update So You Can Do The Exact Same Grind But With A Slightly Different UI, Happy Midnight

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 22, 2026January 22, 2026

Grab your Tinfoil Hats and Prepare the Salt Shakers, Champions of Azeroth! It’s time for the “Twilight Ascension” pre-patch, because…

The Nominees For the Worst Movie of the Year Are Here and honestly who cares
Breaking, Movie News

The Nominees For the Worst Movie of the Year Are Here and honestly who cares

FinnJanuary 21, 2026January 21, 2026

🚨 THE RAZZIE NOMINEES ARE HERE! 🚨 Cinephiles, grab your barf bags and prepare for a cinematic journey so terrible,…

The Fast and the Flurious: Get Ready to Debunk Physics and Your Lunch at Universal Florida
Breaking, Movie News

The Fast and the Flurious: Get Ready to Debunk Physics and Your Lunch at Universal Florida

FinnJanuary 20, 2026January 20, 2026

Universal Orlando has finally decided to listen to the screams of a generation and replace the ear-bleeding auditory nightmare of…

Netflix Declares Every Film Must Include a 10-Minute PowerPoint Presentation So You Can Keep Scrolling TikTok Without Missing Anything
Breaking, Movie News

Netflix Declares Every Film Must Include a 10-Minute PowerPoint Presentation So You Can Keep Scrolling TikTok Without Missing Anything

FinnJanuary 20, 2026January 20, 2026

Oh, sweet merciful streaming gods, gather ’round the digital altar of content consumption, because apparently, our collective attention spans have…

Hi-Fi Rush physical release lets you pre-order the game you were told you couldn’t own
Breaking, Games News

Hi-Fi Rush physical release lets you pre-order the game you were told you couldn’t own

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 16, 2026January 16, 2026

🚨Attention all rhythm game enthusiasts and collectors who still own DVD players in the year of our Lord 2026! 🚨…

THE BLACK DAHLIA MURDER Wastes No Time Booking Yet Another Tour For 2026, Dragging THE ACACIA STRAIN Along For The Ride
Breaking, Live, Music News

THE BLACK DAHLIA MURDER Wastes No Time Booking Yet Another Tour For 2026, Dragging THE ACACIA STRAIN Along For The Ride

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 13, 2026January 13, 2026

🚨 BREAKING NEWS: The Black Dahlia Murder Is Literally Coming To Your Town To End Your Ears (And Maybe Your…

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Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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