James Gunn Turns Superman into “Hachiko 2” — Fans Devastated
Once upon a time, in the faraway land of Hollywood, James Gunn’s “Superman” was supposed to be a fun, adventurous…
Jackal.Today satirical news site
Jackal.Today satirical news site
Once upon a time, in the faraway land of Hollywood, James Gunn’s “Superman” was supposed to be a fun, adventurous…
In March, the self-proclaimed “geniuses” 🧠 from DOGE, led by the ever-stable 🤪 and totally-not-erratic Elon Musk’s Department of Government…
Netflix is gracing us, the unwashed masses, with Barbarian, a cinematic masterpiece so terrifying, it’s been scientifically proven to make…
Sinners, the cinematic masterpiece of 2025 (according to someone, somewhere), boasting a Rotten Tomatoes score so high it’s practically levitating,…
U.S. — Welcome news greeted stressed-out Americans today, as results of a new survey indicated that 10 out of 10…
Wes Anderson is basically the cinematic equivalent of that one friend who only listens to obscure vinyl records and wears…
Read MoreThe OnionRENO, NV—Switching out the torque wrench for something with a little more “oomph,” local sources fiddling under the…
Oh. My. God. 🙄 Did you HEAR about “A Minecraft Movie” 🎬? Apparently, it CAUSES RIOTS. Like, actual, popcorn-throwing, “chicken…
**Oh, honey, bless your heart if you thought the ocean was your personal bathtub before 1975. 🙄 Turns out, there…
Oh, sweet merciful crap, they’re actually making a “Happy Gilmore 2.” 🙄 After 30 years of Adam Sandler’s cinematic genius…