Category: The Onion

       BOULDER, CO—Stressing that it represented an ideal opportunity to see one of nature’s greatest wonders, scientists at the NOAA…

       The 208-year-old publication Farmers’ Almanac, not to be confused with the more famous Old Farmers’ Almanac, will cease publication…

       Sarah Carney, 64, died peacefully last weekend. In lieu of flowers, the family asks if you would mind picking…

       Japan deployed troops into its northern rural regions to combat a surge in bear attacks that has already killed…

       The post Study Finds Most Americans Can’t Find Where They Are Being Deported On Map appeared first on The…

       GUILFORD, CT—Watching in horror as he silently calculated whether he would be able to dive and catch the dropped…

       EVANSTON, IL—After casually asking what she was thinking about getting, patrons at a local restaurant confirmed Tuesday that a…

       LONDON—In response to what his lawyers characterized as “a reckless and defamatory misrepresentation” of the beloved ’90s sitcom about…

       WASHINGTON—Amid a series of sudden actions overhauling landmark federal conservation regulations, the Environmental Protection Agency issued a public statement…

       FOXBOROUGH, MA—Admitting they may have overlooked some key physical metrics in the evaluation process, the New England Patriots front…