Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Family

CANNIBAL CORPSE’s ALEX WEBSTER Claims Death Metal Is Basically SLAYER’s Unhinged Lovechild
Breaking, Music News

CANNIBAL CORPSE’s ALEX WEBSTER Claims Death Metal Is Basically SLAYER’s Unhinged Lovechild

Chord F. DiscordDecember 31, 2025December 31, 2025

When Death Metal Was Just Dad’s Old Rock Records and a Dream 😈🎸 Back in the day, before streaming algorithms…

MEGADETH’s DAVE MUSTAINE Slams Other Bands’ Farewell Tours Like a Thrash Riff to the Face
Breaking, Music News

MEGADETH’s DAVE MUSTAINE Slams Other Bands’ Farewell Tours Like a Thrash Riff to the Face

Chord F. DiscordDecember 30, 2025December 30, 2025

🚨 BREAKING: Dave Mustaine Announces Retirement… Or Is He Just Tired of Tuning His Guitar? 🚨 In a shocking turn…

Marvel Drops a New Thor Trailer for Avengers: Doomsday — And It’s So Different You’ll Think You’re Watching a Fan Edit
Breaking, Movie News

Marvel Drops a New Thor Trailer for Avengers: Doomsday — And It’s So Different You’ll Think You’re Watching a Fan Edit

Pixel P. SnarkbyteDecember 30, 2025December 30, 2025

🚨 BREAKING: Thor Returns in Avengers: Doomsday Trailer, Crying to His Dad (Again) 🪓😭 In a shocking turn of events…

NECROBUTCHER Hopes MAYHEM Survives Another Two Decades of Corpse Paint and Chaos
Breaking, Music News

NECROBUTCHER Hopes MAYHEM Survives Another Two Decades of Corpse Paint and Chaos

Chord F. DiscordDecember 29, 2025December 29, 2025

🎵 When Black Metal Meets Retirement Plans: MAYHEM’s Quest to Outlive Their Fans (and Possibly Themselves) 🧓‍♂️⚰️ In a shocking…

A Texas Teen Vanishes on Christmas Eve—Santa’s Suspected, Authorities Say “Check the Naughty List First”
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

A Texas Teen Vanishes on Christmas Eve—Santa’s Suspected, Authorities Say “Check the Naughty List First”

Big ElephantDecember 29, 2025December 29, 2025

The Great American Mystery: Teen Vanishes on Christmas Eve, FBI Called In to Find Out If She Joined the Squad…

The Most Expensive Disasters of 2025
Breaking, Movie News

The Most Expensive Disasters of 2025

FinnDecember 29, 2025December 29, 2025

2025 was a cinematic dumpster fire wrapped in a CGI explosion and served with a side of “but the algorithm…

‘Malcolm in the Middle’ Trailer Finally Explains Why We All Have Trust Issues
Breaking, Movie News

‘Malcolm in the Middle’ Trailer Finally Explains Why We All Have Trust Issues

FinnDecember 29, 2025December 29, 2025

🚨 BREAKING: Malcolm in the Middle Returns to Remind Us That Life is Still Unfair… Especially for People Who Thought…

Original AC/DC Singer DAVE EVANS Recalls Band’s First Show: ‘It Was Packed To The Rafters… and So Were My Pants’
Breaking, Music News

Original AC/DC Singer DAVE EVANS Recalls Band’s First Show: ‘It Was Packed To The Rafters… and So Were My Pants’

Chord F. DiscordDecember 28, 2025December 28, 2025

When AC/DC Got Their Name: A Tale of Sewing Machines, Sister-In-Law Sorcery, and the Power of Not Paying Your Singer…

Watch: ALICE COOPER Plays With Orchestra Like It’s Not a Heavy Metal Funeral
Breaking, Music News

Watch: ALICE COOPER Plays With Orchestra Like It’s Not a Heavy Metal Funeral

Chord F. DiscordDecember 26, 2025December 26, 2025

When Alice Cooper Met the Symphony Orchestra, and the Classical World Never Saw It Coming 😱🎻 In a turn of…

Can’t Feel Your Face? Try This Guinness Record for Maximum Chill
Live

Can’t Feel Your Face? Try This Guinness Record for Maximum Chill

Chuck B. BallsyDecember 26, 2025

🚨 BREAKING: A suspiciously well-coordinated invasion of tourists, food trucks, and inflatable slides descends upon Birch Bay this summer, sponsored…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 62 63 64 … 105 Next

Latest posts

  • Trump Gets to Decide Whether to Bomb Iran Now
  • NYC Woman Adds Hate Crimes to Already Impressive Resume
  • Nicki Minaj Eyed as New Press Secretary in Surprise White House Move
  • Spin of the Day: A Texas police department participated in a program that led to many deportations in their town. — 9% Mostly Reality
  • Federal Judges Unimpressed By Trump’s Latest Voting Hail Mary

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.