Pundits Praise Strength, Dexterity Required For Trump To Successfully Lift Middle Finger

JT

      

NEW YORK—Lauding the commander-in-chief’s response to being heckled at a Ford plant as a stunning physical feat, pundits from multiple media outlets praised President Donald Trump on Thursday for summoning the strength and dexterity necessary to successfully lift his middle finger. “The obscene gesture Trump made in Michigan was brimming with youthful vitality, not to mention quite a bit of technical finesse,” said Fox News’ Sean Hannity, echoing the sentiment of dozens of political commentators who remarked that the 79-year-old Trump had flipped the bird with the deftness and vigor of a man half his age. “No president since Teddy Roosevelt has possessed the raw bodily prowess required not only to lift his middle finger, but also to hold it in the air—completely unassisted—for nearly a full second. Most leaders would struggle to flip someone off as effortlessly as Trump did, and none of them could pull it off while walking with such bold, muscular steps. It borders on superhuman, but that’s just the kind of athleticism you come to expect with such an incredible physical specimen leading our country.” Hannity went on to commend the mental acuity and “rapier wit” that allowed Trump to come up with a retort for the heckler as scathing as “Fuck you.”

The post Pundits Praise Strength, Dexterity Required For Trump To Successfully Lift Middle Finger appeared first on The Onion.

   NEW YORK—Lauding the commander-in-chief’s response to being heckled at a Ford plant as a stunning physical feat, pundits from multiple media outlets praised President Donald Trump on Thursday for summoning the strength and dexterity necessary to successfully lift his middle finger. “The obscene gesture Trump made in Michigan was brimming with youthful vitality, not to
The post Pundits Praise Strength, Dexterity Required For Trump To Successfully Lift Middle Finger appeared first on The Onion. Read More

Finn

Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.

Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.

Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.

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