LOS ANGELES—In an effort to support his children as they attempted to distance themselves from their difficult upbringing, actor Brad Pitt announced on Monday that he was dropping his surname in solidarity with his family. “I understand why my kids want no part of ‘Pitt,’ and if they don’t want it, neither do I,” said the Academy Award–winning star of Once Upon A Time…In Hollywood, adding that he had not yet decided if, going forward, he would adopt a new last name, go without a last name, or simply repeat his first name twice. “I want them to know that I stand with them as they bravely turn the page on the hell I put them through. So when they decide that being associated with me is just an unacceptable way to live the rest of their lives, you’d better believe I’m giving them my 100% support and the name change to prove it. That’s what being a dad’s all about.” At press time, sources confirmed the actor’s annoyed children were rapidly changing their last names back to “Pitt.”
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Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.