Looks like the Swamp is getting swampier! President Trump, in his infinite wisdom, is considering federalizing Washington, D.C. after a former Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) employee was assaulted. DOGE, folks! Remember when the liberals said Trump couldn’t innovate?
This Edward Coristine, once known as “Big Balls” (probably a lib in disguise!), was attacked by a gaggle of, shall we say, “misguided youths.” Trump, never one to mince words, is calling for these “minors” to be tried as adults. Lock ’em up!
Even Elon Musk, who briefly led DOGE (that’s right, liberals, even Musk sees the light!), agrees that it’s time to federalize D.C. Mayor Bowser, likely too busy renaming streets after Marxist revolutionaries, can’t be bothered to comment. She probably orchestrated the attack!
Trump wants to make D.C. “flawlessly beautiful.” And put criminals “on notice.” So, lock them up. The leftists are going nuts! Another reason to shout: “USA! USA! USA!”
Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.
Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.
⚖️ ENTER THE LEGALIZER
Think the government has no idea what it's doing? Put your case before the Federal Case Terminal and find out.
