WASHINGTON—Saying the sumptuous gift should slake the administration’s thirst for the next few months, Fox News sent President Donald Trump its quarterly tithe of three blond anchors, White House sources confirmed Friday. “We have traveled south to the White House steps to present you with these three Kayleighs,” said Fox Corporation CEO Lachlan Murdoch, who was flanked by a traveling court of lute players and jesters brought along to amuse the president. “This stock represents the finest tenth of our quarterly newscaster harvest, and we beseech your fealty in return. We humbly apologize that the last batch was not young enough. To atone for this transgression, we have included several prize hogs to curry extra favor.” According to sources, the Trump administration was so pleased with the offering that it granted Fox News one sweaty commentator in exchange.
The post Fox News Sends Trump Quarterly Tithe Of 3 Blond Anchors appeared first on The Onion.
WASHINGTON—Saying the sumptuous gift should slake the administration’s thirst for the next few months, Fox News sent President Donald Trump its quarterly tithe of three blond anchors, White House sources confirmed Friday. “We have traveled south to the White House steps to present you with these three Kayleighs,” said Fox Corporation CEO Lachlan Murdoch, who
The post Fox News Sends Trump Quarterly Tithe Of 3 Blond Anchors appeared first on The Onion. Read More
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
