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Trump Promises To Bring Back $5 Footlongs If Republicans Win

Trump Promises To Bring Back $5 Footlongs If Republicans Win

   

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In his latest attempt to entice voters to turn out for the November midterm elections, President Donald Trump announced on Tuesday that he was promising to bring back $5 footlongs if Republicans retained control of both houses of Congress.

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Finn

Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.

Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.

Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.

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