Andy Reid Seated At Empty Wedding Table With 12 Dinners

JT

      

NEW YORK—Navigating the venue in search of his place setting, wedding guest Andy Reid was reportedly pleased Friday to find that Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce had seated him at an empty table with 12 dinners assigned to him. “I think this is me,” said the Kansas City Chiefs head coach to the dozen plates as he sat down, draping his suit jacket over the back of his chair before rubbing his hands together in anticipation. “Well, I know who I’ll be spending the rest of the reception with—am I right, beef? How thoughtful of the happy couple to seat me at my very own carving station. So, tell me, how long have you been an entrée?” At press time, the happy newlyweds were feeding Andy Reid cake.

The post Andy Reid Seated At Empty Wedding Table With 12 Dinners appeared first on The Onion.

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Finn

Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.

Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.

Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.

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