The inaugural Enhanced Games, consisting of weightlifting, swimming, and sprinting, were held, which allowed competitors to take performance-enhancing drugs in hopes of pushing the limits of human achievement. What do you think?
“Eat shit, indomitable human spirit—it’s drugs’ time to shine.”
Tony Skow, Recipe Auditor
“These are great role models for kids who don’t have time to work hard and apply themselves.”
Brenda Pool, Wire Spooler
“Let’s dispense with the human element and just see which drugs are strongest.”
Garrett Horvath, Unemployed
The post Enhanced Games Allows Competing Athletes To Use Steroids appeared first on The Onion.
The inaugural Enhanced Games, consisting of weightlifting, swimming, and sprinting, were held, which allowed competitors to take performance-enhancing drugs in hopes of pushing the limits of human achievement. What do you think?
The post Enhanced Games Allows Competing Athletes To Use Steroids appeared first on The Onion. Read More
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
