Musk Signals Willingness To Bid More Than $97 Billion To Acquire Respect
Read MoreThe OnionWASHINGTON—Stressing that he was open to going far higher to close the deal, Tesla CEO Elon Musk announced…
Author: Finn McFrame
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed "Emperor of Irony," started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
Democrats Furious Republicans Trying To Control Government Just Because They Won Election
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Democrats have unleashed furious attacks on Republicans for using winning the election as an excuse to try…
Government Retirement Files Ruined After Miners Dig Too Deep And Unearth Balrog
BOYERS, PA — The Iron Mountain Federal Records Center has reportedly lost access to all federal retirement files after miners…
Man So Hungry He Could Eat An Orange
Read MoreThe OnionHARTFORD, CT—Telling his skeptical friends that he was in no way being hyperbolic as he described his ravenous…
Oregon Rep Asks Trump To Be Her Valentine
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a touching display of old-fashioned romance, Representative Maxine Dexter of Oregon used a speech to publicly…
Man Helpfully Explains To Wife Why She Should Be In Better Mood
MURFREESBORO, TN — According to sources, local husband Scott Limber rescued his wife from depression by helpfully explaining why she…
Workplace Win: Trump Says It’s OK To Call Female Coworkers ‘Toots’
WASHINGTON, DC — Donald Trump has approved a measure normalizing once again the practice of calling female employees ‘Toots’. Read…
Sauron-Appointed Judge Rules Frodo Must Return Ring To Sauron
CIRITH UNGOL — The One Ring must be returned to its rightful owner, The Dark Lord Sauron, a Sauron-appointed judge…
GigSlave Goes Public With $84 Billion Valuation
Read MoreThe OnionThe post GigSlave Goes Public With $84 Billion Valuation appeared first on The Onion. Finn McFrameFinn McFrame, celebrated…
PBS Drops DEI, Announces Bert And Ernie Are Now Straight
ARLINGTON, VA — In response to mounting pressure from various stakeholders, the Public Broadcasting Service (PBS) announced the immediate discontinuation…