So, IRON MAIDEN’s very own air raid siren, Bruce Dickinson, is gracing us with a “reworked” version of his ’90s masterpiece (debatable), “Balls To Picasso”, now cleverly titled “More Balls To Picasso”. Yes, you read that right. More balls. The lyrical genius of our time has unleashed the lyric video for the lead single, “Gods Of War”. Prepare to be amazed… or not. 🙄
Apparently, this “timely message” (because gods of war are SO relevant in 2024, right?) features the earth-shattering contribution of some Brazilian composer dude, Antonio Teoli, who threw in some Amazonian indigenous instruments. Because nothing says “heavy metal” like a didgeridoo. It’s a “striking taste” of the reimagined album, supposedly bringing to life the “roaringly full-throttle and ambitious” collection of songs. I’m sure it’ll be as subtle as a sledgehammer to the face. 🔨
Back in ’94, when Dickinson took a “break” from IRON MAIDEN (probably to let his vocal cords recover from all the screaming), he released “Balls To Picasso”. The title, a tribute to Picasso‘s spherical-object-turned-square phase, was apparently meant to be ironic. Because nothing screams “serious solo artist” like a bathroom wall graffiti album cover. 🚽
This album, his first with Roy “Z” Ramirez and TRIBE OF GYPSIES, went through “various iterations.” Translation: it was a hot mess. Produced by Shay Baby (who?), it spawned classics like “Tears Of The Dragon” (a power ballad for dragons with allergies?) and “Shoot All The Clowns” (a PSA against mimes?). Oh, and who can forget the epic “Laughing In The Hiding Bush”? (Sounds like a Monty Python sketch gone wrong). 🤣
Despite its “positive reception” (says who?), Dickinson felt it never quite captured his “original vision.” Because apparently, the first version wasn’t pretentious enough. Now, with the power to revisit his solo catalog (thanks to the success of “The Mandrake Project” – did anyone actually listen to that?), he’s re-recorded, remixed, and remastered it. It’s now a “fresh and contemporary release,” because nothing says “contemporary” like re-hashing old ideas. ♻️
Dickinson himself says, “While mixing all my catalogue into Dolby Atmos I had a nagging desire to revisit and reinvent the record.” Translation: “I was bored and had too much time on my hands.” He “beefed up the guitars” (because apparently they weren’t beefy enough), added some “beautiful work” by some other dude on “Tears…” (because the original wasn’t tear-inducing enough?), and, of course, those Amazonian instruments. 🌴
“‘Shoot All The Clowns’ gets the benefit of a horn section fronted by the Berklee College Of Music.” Because what this song really needed was more clowns. And horns. It all gets the “benefit” of a mix by Brendan Duffey (who also worked on “The Mandrake Project” – oh joy!), with notes from Shay Baby, the “original father” of the album. (Sounds like a paternity suit waiting to happen). 👶
As if that weren’t enough, “More Balls To Picasso” includes two previously unreleased live-in-the-studio tracks. Because everyone needs more live versions of songs they barely remember in the first place. It’ll be available on splatter vinyl (because why not?) and tri-panel digisleeve CD (for those who still own CD players). 💿
Here’s the track listing, for those brave enough to endure it:
01. Cyclops (One-eyed monster? Groundbreaking.)
02. Hell No (Subtle.)
03. Gods Of War (Still relevant.)
04. 1000 Points Of Light (Sounds like a cheesy power ballad.)
05. Laughing In The Hiding Bush (Still hilarious.)
06. Change Of Heart (Predictable.)
07. Shoot All The Clowns (Still advocating violence against mimes.)
08. Fire (Hot.)
09. Sacred Cowboys (WTF?)
10. Tears Of The Dragon (Allergies are a b*tch.)
11. Gods Of War (live in the studio)* (Because once wasn’t enough.)
12. Shoot All The Clowns (live in the studio)* (Mimes beware!)
* Previously unreleased (for good reason)
This summer, Dickinson is embarking on his first extensive North American solo tour in almost 30 years. Because apparently, he needs the money. The setlist will encompass his entire solo career, so prepare for a night of obscure tracks and questionable fashion choices. The tour includes festival appearances at Rocklahoma and Louder Than Life, because nothing says “rock and roll” like playing in Oklahoma. 🎸
Joining Dickinson on tour will be his 2024 backing band, featuring a bunch of dudes you’ve probably never heard of. And, of course, the obligatory Swedish guitarist and Swiss guitarist. Because every band needs a token European. Sorry, Roy Z isn’t part of the lineup. Maybe he finally had enough of Dickinson‘s ego. 👋
“The Mandrake Project” arrived on March 1, 2024. Did anyone notice? 🤷♀️
Bruce and Roy recorded “The Mandrake Project” at Los Angeles’s Doom Room. Fitting. The recording lineup was rounded out by Mistheria and Moreno, because who else would agree to work with them? 🤔
Dickinson made his recording debut with IRON MAIDEN on “The Number Of The Beast” in 1982. He quit the band in 1993 to pursue his solo career, because everyone knows solo careers are always more successful. He rejoined in 1999, because reality set in. 🤦♂️
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could “play the kazoo in four languages.”
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
