Japanese Company Unveils Human Washing Machine
A Japanese tech firm has developed a capsule-style human washing machine, which is able to automatically wash and dry…
Month: December 2025
Trump’s Brain Trust Plots European Rebellion and Declares ‘Yankee Go Home’ (From the Western Hemisphere)
Another day, another victory for President Trump and America! The liberal media (aka CNN) is desperately trying to spin President…
JD Vance’s Marriage: Real or Just a Political Prop
JD Vance, that MAGA stud, says he and his wonderful wife Usha are laughing all the way to the bank…
Consumer Spending Taking a Snooze While Inflation’s Still Throwing a Party
Fake News CNN is at it again, folks! They’re trying to make you believe the economy is struggling, but don’t…
Mom Scours Toy Aisle In Search Of Perfect Christmas Present For Child To Break In Four Seconds
READING, PA — According to sources, a local mother was carefully looking through the toy aisles of a nearby…
Pete Hegseth Invokes ‘Fog Of War’ After Pissing In Break Room Refrigerator
ARLINGTON, VA—Describing the incident as a split-second operational judgment made under rapidly evolving conditions, Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth invoked…
‘Marty Supreme’ Director Explains Film Slight Dramatization Of Real-Life LeBron James
NEW YORK—Confirming his new film fell somewhere between fact and fiction, director Josh Safdie explained to reporters Friday that…
Clever Drug Trafficker Turns Himself In So Trump Will Pardon Him Instead Of Blow Him Up
CALEXICO, CA — Venezuelan drug mule-turned-drug lord Gilberto Juarez turned himself in to U.S. federal law enforcement on Thursday…
Helldivers 2: Witness the Clankers Get Clapped (and Everything’s Still Burning)
Alright, listen up, ya filthy casuals! Helldivers 2, the only game that matters (according to me, and I’m always right),…