Another day, another so-called “mass shooting” averted by brave, God-fearing Americans. Seems like this “Brian Anthony Browning” fellow, probably a product of liberal indoctrination, decided to bring his anti-God agenda to a Michigan church. But guess what? Good guys with guns (and trucks!) stopped him cold.
Turns out, this Browning character had a history with the church, attending with his mom. Probably got a good dose of truth before the woke mind virus took over. Pastor Bobby Kelly said he “had some thoughts as far as hearing from God.” Translation: he was probably wrestling with the same demonic forces that plague our entire society!
And get this, folks: the shooting happened during Vacation Bible School! These godless leftists are targeting our children now! Thankfully, quick-thinking church members and security staff were ready. One hero even used his pickup truck to take out Browning before he could inflict more damage. Now that’s what I call divine intervention!
Of course, the liberal media will probably spin this as a “gun violence” issue and demand more restrictions on our Second Amendment rights. But we know the truth: the only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a bigger truck!
The police found a whole arsenal at Browning’s house. Where did he get the money? Soros, probably. This was a planned attack, folks, part of the Left’s ongoing war on Christianity. But we won’t back down. We will defend our faith, our families, and our freedom! God bless America, and God bless the brave men and women who protect our churches!
Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.
Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.
