Hold onto your space pants, moviegoers! 20th Century Studios just dropped the trailer for the new “Predator” movie, and the internet has exploded. Meet “Predator: Badlands” – the film where Elle Fanning, the size of a chihuahua, saves the galaxy, and the Predator looks like he escaped from a WNBA game. Yep, you heard that right: dreads, seven feet tall, and judging by the trailer, some pretty sick dribbling skills. Get ready for an intergalactic battle, feminism over 9000, and tons of awkward humor. The premiere is in IMAX on November 7th, so grab your popcorn and prepare for some serious facepalms.
🔥 Elle Fanning vs. Basketball Predator! What the…? 😱
So, Elle Fanning, known for her role as Sleeping Beauty (hopefully, she’ll be more awake in “Badlands”), plays Taa – a girl who, apparently, saves universes in her spare time between collecting plant specimens. Her mission is to help a young Predator. Apparently, even alien hunters have issues with teenage rebellion and finding themselves. But the main question everyone’s asking: what kind of Predator-transformer did they give us? Where’s the brutal macho with jaws like a steel trap? Instead, we get a basketball player with dreads who seems more interested in slam dunks than hunting humans. The internet is already boiling with memes comparing the new Predator to LeBron James in makeup. 😂
Director Dan Trachtenberg, who directed the previous installment, apparently decided the franchise needed more wokeness and absurdity. Well, he succeeded. Fans are furious, critics are confused, and bookmakers are taking bets on how many facepalms the average viewer will make during the screening. The film takes place in the distant future, in an uncharted galaxy. Apparently, so far away that decent screenwriters couldn’t reach it. The Predator is looking for the perfect opponent. We wonder if he’ll find it in Elle Fanning, armed with a magnifying glass and a notebook for botanical notes?
Overall, “Predator: Badlands” promises to be the strangest and most ridiculous movie of the year. Get ready for epic battles, illogical plotlines, and tons of cringe. And while we wait for the premiere, we can fantasize about what other surprises the creators have in store for us. Maybe the Predator will turn out to be a vegan and will feed on space cabbage? Or maybe Elle Fanning will teach him to play the ukulele? The possibilities are endless! The main thing is not to forget to bring a bucket of popcorn and a couple of packs of tranquilizers to the screening. 🍿🧘♀️
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
Another day, another celebrity pretending to be relatable.