Oh, the horror! CNN is reporting that some “cybercriminal group” called “Scattered Spider” (probably funded by George Soros) has been “breaching” airlines. Sounds like another Deep State plot to disrupt travel and make us all dependent on their socialist trains!
They claim it hasn’t affected “airline safety,” but how can we trust anything coming from these liberal outlets? Probably just a matter of time before they start blaming Trump for this too. And of course, they mention “geo-political tensions,” code for blaming Russia or China, because everything is always someone else’s fault, right?
The FBI is “actively working” with airlines? Yeah, right. Probably just giving them diversity training and telling them to use preferred pronouns for hackers.
But don’t worry, folks. True Americans know how to handle these situations. Lock and load your computers, pray to St. Ronald Reagan, and make sure your passwords are extra secure. And remember, if you see something, say something – unless it’s about Hillary’s emails, then just ignore it.
Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.
Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.
