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Month: August 2025

CNN: Trump’s vanity project highway arrives just in time to maybe not matter in Armenia-Azerbaijan peace talks
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN: Trump’s vanity project highway arrives just in time to maybe not matter in Armenia-Azerbaijan peace talks

Big ElephantAugust 8, 2025August 8, 2025

Another day, another win for President Trump! While the liberal media obsesses over their latest conspiracy theories, our fearless leader…

Sharon Osbourne Roasts Ridiculous Claims of $190M Charity Windfall: ‘Yeah Right’
Breaking, Music News

Sharon Osbourne Roasts Ridiculous Claims of $190M Charity Windfall: ‘Yeah Right’

Chord F. DiscordAugust 8, 2025August 8, 2025

Sharon Osbourne, the puppet master 🎭 behind the Prince of Darkness 🦇 (RIP, btw, spoiler alert 🚨), has come out…

White House desperately tries to make you forget Trump’s epic BLS blunder, bless their hearts
Elephant Reads CNN

White House desperately tries to make you forget Trump’s epic BLS blunder, bless their hearts

Big ElephantAugust 8, 2025August 8, 2025

Another day, another Deep State conspiracy! President Trump, in his infinite wisdom, has called out the Bureau of Labor Statistics…

Oh Great, Another Mario Merch Mountain to Climb, Japan Gets First Dibs
Breaking, Games News

Oh Great, Another Mario Merch Mountain to Climb, Japan Gets First Dibs

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 8, 2025August 8, 2025

Alright, listen up, you overgrown toddlers! 🍄 Nintendo, in its infinite wisdom (or perhaps fueled by copious amounts of sake…

Amazon Prime Gaming’s August Freebies: Prepare to be Underwhelmed by Thief and a Game Older Than Your Grandma, Civilization 3
Breaking, Games News

Amazon Prime Gaming’s August Freebies: Prepare to be Underwhelmed by Thief and a Game Older Than Your Grandma, Civilization 3

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 8, 2025August 8, 2025

Oh, look, another month, another pathetic attempt by Amazon to bribe us with “free” games through their glorious Prime Gaming!…

Konami FINALLY Acknowledges MGS3 Remake’s Multiplayer Will Arrive… Eventually
Breaking, Games News

Konami FINALLY Acknowledges MGS3 Remake’s Multiplayer Will Arrive… Eventually

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 8, 2025August 8, 2025

🤣Oh, sweet, innocent gamers, brace yourselves! Metal Gear Solid Delta: Snake Eater, or as I like to call it, “Konami’s…

Wo-Chien’t Believe It! Shiny Moldy Green Toilet Paper Pokémon Available Now!
Breaking, Games News

Wo-Chien’t Believe It! Shiny Moldy Green Toilet Paper Pokémon Available Now!

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 8, 2025August 8, 2025

Alright, listen up, you beautiful bunch of basement-dwelling Pokémon trainers! 😂 So, remember that Pokémon Presents in July 2025? Yeah,…

Hentai corporate at Brutal Assault 2025 (08/08/2025)
Videos

Hentai corporate at Brutal Assault 2025 (08/08/2025)

Chuck B. BallsyAugust 8, 2025

Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of Snark,” is a self-proclaimed sports…

Pig destroyer at Brutal Assault 2025 (08/08/2025)
Videos

Pig destroyer at Brutal Assault 2025 (08/08/2025)

Chuck B. BallsyAugust 8, 2025

Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of Snark,” is a self-proclaimed sports…

The Onion

RFK Jr. Recommends Eating Good Cancer To Kill The Bad Cancer

FinnAugust 8, 2025

    Read MoreThe OnionWASHINGTON—Suggesting an unorthodox alternative to standard oncological treatments, Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. issued…

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Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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