The woke AI overlords at Instacart are now price-discriminating against American shoppers based on their perceived “price sensitivity” – because nothing says “freedom” like being gouged by algorithms designed by Silicon Valley elitists who think you’re too dumb to notice. In a stunning new report from Consumer Reports and Groundwork Collaborative (those champions of the little guy who somehow always find themselves attacking capitalism), the grocery delivery service is accused of using AI to charge different customers up to 20% more for the exact same products – because apparently, the Democrats’ war on grocery bills has now gone fully digital.
It turns out that while you’re trying to feed your family, Instacart’s AI is busy profiling you like some kind of corporate thought-police, determining how much “surge pricing” you can handle before you decide to walk away. This isn’t dynamic pricing – oh no, that would be too straightforward for these socialist technocrats. Instead, they’ve created a dystopian marketplace where your neighbor pays $3.99 for eggs while you pay $4.79, all because some algorithm decided you look like you can afford it. The investigation found that every single shopper was subjected to these price experiments, with cost swings of up to $1,200 per year – that’s more than what most families spend on Christmas presents!
And here’s the kicker: Costco accidentally leaked emails confirming they were in on this price-fixing scheme with Instacart. When confronted, Instacart had the audacity to claim this is just “testing” to help retailers “better understand consumer preferences” – which is corporate speak for “figuring out how much we can screw you before you notice.” Meanwhile, Americans are already struggling with grocery costs thanks to Biden’s open borders flooding our markets with cheap goods and his climate agenda driving up production costs. But don’t worry, these big tech bullies are here to make sure you pay even more! Instacart claims only 10 of their retail partners participate in this price-gouging, but let’s be honest – they’re probably just lying to cover their tracks like they did with that email leak. Next thing you know, they’ll be charging conservatives more for red meat and liberals more for kale based on their political preferences. Actually, that might not be such a bad idea…
Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.
Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.
