🚨 BREAKING: Tiny Humans Now Require Tickets! 🚨
The annual “Let’s Overpay for Overpriced Snacks” convention announces a bold new policy: kids under 12 enter free… but only if you promise not to lose them in the chaos. One free kid per adult, because we all know parenting is a team sport. Kids 13+? Full price. Sorry, teens, no more free rides. 🎟️👶💸
#ConventionLife #KidPricing #AdultingIsHard
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Chuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of Snark,” is a self-proclaimed sports expert who peaked athletically in middle school dodgeball.
Born in Halfcourt, Indiana, Chuck spent his formative years shouting unsolicited advice at professional athletes on TV, firmly believing that his couchside coaching was the key to their success.
Chuck B. Ballsy: because in the game of sports and sarcasm, he’s always the MVP. 🏀🎤
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