Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Day: March 1, 2026

Live

“Sunday Selectors w/ Kim Lightfoot: Because Clearly, No One Else Could Handle the ‘Selecting’ Task”

Chuck B. BallsyMarch 1, 2026

Sunday nights at Refuge: Where your ears go to church and your liver goes to rehab Every Sunday, Refuge transforms…

Live

Sunday Selectors w/ Kim Lightfoot: Where We Pretend to Know What We’re Doing While You Watch in Amazement

Chuck B. BallsyMarch 1, 2026

**Refuge: Where the Bass Hits Harder Than Your Ex’s New Partner** 🎛️ Every Sunday, Refuge transforms East Williamsburg into a…

Live

Liwanag: Harana sa Gabi [4th Annual Spring Charity Gala] – Where Rich People Pretend to Care About Charity While Eating Expensive CanapĂ©s

Chuck B. BallsyMarch 1, 2026

Attention, culture vultures! 🦚 The FASA Spring Charity Gala is back, and this year’s theme is *Liwanag: Harana sa Gabi*…

JW Youth Gala 2026: Where Teens Dress Like Adults and Adults Pretend to Be Teens Again
Live

JW Youth Gala 2026: Where Teens Dress Like Adults and Adults Pretend to Be Teens Again

Chuck B. BallsyMarch 1, 2026

Eventbrite’s 2026 JW Youth Gala: A Masterclass in How to Sell Zero Tickets Eventbrite’s homepage is a labyrinth of confusion,…

Live

Teddy Riley Talks and Jams: When New Jack Swing Meets Awkward Q&A

Chuck B. BallsyMarch 1, 2026

ATTENTION MUSIC GEEKS: TEDDY RILEY WANTS TO CHAT! Ready to witness a living legend who’s basically a walking Wikipedia of…

“Chef Elle Simone Scott Gets Roasted… With a Fancy Dinner, Because Knives Are Too Obvious”
Live

“Chef Elle Simone Scott Gets Roasted… With a Fancy Dinner, Because Knives Are Too Obvious”

Chuck B. BallsyMarch 1, 2026

Femme Noir: A Collaborative Dinner Honoring Chef Elle Simone Scott 🍴🍽️ An unforgettable evening of culinary artistry is coming to…

Trump’s Cartel Crackdown: More Dangerous Than His Twitter Fingers?
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Cartel Crackdown: More Dangerous Than His Twitter Fingers?

Big ElephantMarch 1, 2026March 1, 2026

Wow, Trump’s Drug War Just Got REAL! Mexico’s Cartel Kingpin Bites the Dust After Trump’s Ultimatum President Trump just showed…

Phasmophobia Revamps Its First Map So Ghosts Can Finally Get Some Privacy and Hide Better
Phasmophobia's Tanglewood Revamp: Because Clearly Your Childhood Home Wasn't Scary Enough
Breaking, Games News

Phasmophobia Revamps Its First Map So Ghosts Can Finally Get Some Privacy and Hide Better

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMarch 1, 2026March 1, 2026

Oh look, Kinetic Games is at it again—taking perfectly functional ghost-hunting content and slapping a fresh coat of haunted paint…

Xbox Begins With Console, But Asha Sharma’s Real Plan Is to Sprinkle Some Fun Dust and Magic Culture Fairy Powder All Over It
Breaking, Games News

Xbox Begins With Console, But Asha Sharma’s Real Plan Is to Sprinkle Some Fun Dust and Magic Culture Fairy Powder All Over It

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMarch 1, 2026March 1, 2026

Oh, look—a shiny new CEO at Xbox! 🙌 Just what the world needed, right? Because when you think of gaming…

FEAR FACTORY’s DINO CAZARES SHUTS DOOR ON Ex-Members: ‘Chapter Closed Forever, No Key Under Mat’
FEAR FACTORY's Dino Cazares is done with his ex-bandmates, and he wants everyone to know it—preferably without getting angry emails about it
Breaking, Music News

FEAR FACTORY’s DINO CAZARES SHUTS DOOR ON Ex-Members: ‘Chapter Closed Forever, No Key Under Mat’

Chord F. DiscordMarch 1, 2026March 1, 2026

FEAR FACTORY’s founding guitarist Dino Cazares has officially closed the door on working with any former members of the band,…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 2 3 … 5 Next

Latest posts

  • Spider-Man Breaks Box Office Records Again Because Of Course It Does
  • Why Hollywood Keeps Making the Same Movies Over and Over
  • Lita Ford somehow still alive and making music again
  • Tony Iommi still making riffs because what else is he gonna do
  • Lollapalooza 2026 Sizzles with Jennie and Wolf Alice Sets

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
March 2026
S M T W T F S
1234567
891011121314
15161718192021
22232425262728
293031  
« Feb   Apr »
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.