AKRON, OH—Saying the expectations he had set for himself were completely unrealistic, friends of local man James Chao expressed skepticism this morning after the 25-year-old announced plans to get two different things done today. “When I heard James say he was going to pick up some groceries, that was one thing, but when he told me he also wanted to do his laundry, I realized he was pushing himself way too hard,” said roommate Aaron Steiner, adding that Chao was apparently oblivious to how much sustained focus and effort would be required to complete not just one, but two tasks in a single 24-hour period. “At a certain point, you’re only setting yourself up for failure. If you get one thing done, you’ve already gone way past any reasonable person’s expectations. Try for a second thing and, I mean, there’s just no way. That guy really needs to slow down and give himself a moment to put this whole thing into perspective.” At press time, Chao’s friends were reportedly urging him to stop and take it easy after they found him in the kitchen wearing a clean shirt and preparing a meal for himself.
The post Overambitious Man Wants To Get 2 Things Done Today appeared first on The Onion.
AKRON, OH—Saying the expectations he had set for himself were completely unrealistic, friends of local man James Chao expressed skepticism this morning after the 25-year-old announced plans to get two different things done today. “When I heard James say he was going to pick up some groceries, that was one thing, but when he told
The post Overambitious Man Wants To Get 2 Things Done Today appeared first on The Onion. Read More
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
