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Day: April 13, 2026

Events

Finally Robots Will Be Smarter Than Us Oh Joy

Chuck B. BallsyApril 13, 2026

🌟 Gain max with AI on April 14, 2026, 8:30-13:00 🕰️ with Gabriel Tassé 🤓 🚀 Chuck B. BallsyChuck B.…

Hiker Airlifted After Being Stung By Bees Over 100 Times
The Onion

Hiker Airlifted After Being Stung By Bees Over 100 Times

FinnApril 13, 2026

       A hiker was forced to be airlifted after he was stung by bees over 100 times, with officials claiming…

Justin Bieber Performs Coachella Aftershow Lying Face-Down On Massage Table
The Onion

Justin Bieber Performs Coachella Aftershow Lying Face-Down On Massage Table

FinnApril 13, 2026

       The post Justin Bieber Performs Coachella Aftershow Lying Face-Down On Massage Table appeared first on The Onion.    The post…

Trump Escalates Feud With Unclear Adversary By Posting AI Video Of Self Fucking Basketball
The Onion

Trump Escalates Feud With Unclear Adversary By Posting AI Video Of Self Fucking Basketball

FinnApril 13, 2026

       WASHINGTON—Shocking Truth Social followers with a graphic insult to a nebulous opponent, President Donald Trump escalated a feud with…

Babylon Bee

Thanks, Wokeness: Commercials No Longer Showing Medicine As Tiny Little Warriors Who Murder Tiny Little Germs

FinnApril 13, 2026

    U.S. — According to advertising experts, the reason television commercials no longer depict medicine as tiny little warriors murdering…

Finally Non Americans Can Waste Their Money On Overpriced Virtual Gifts For Streamers Theyve Never Met
Breaking

Finally Non Americans Can Waste Their Money On Overpriced Virtual Gifts For Streamers Theyve Never Met

Pixel P. SnarkbyteApril 13, 2026April 13, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some exciting news? 🤩 YouTube has announced that it’s expanding its super popular…

Fake news judge trashes Trump’s awesome lawsuit again
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Fake news judge trashes Trump’s awesome lawsuit again

Big ElephantApril 13, 2026April 13, 2026

It’s absolutely hilarious to see the so-called “journalists” and “experts” trying to criticize our great President Donald Trump, who has…

Who cares about NSYNC loser Joey Fatone’s stupid documentary thing
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Who cares about NSYNC loser Joey Fatone’s stupid documentary thing

Big ElephantApril 13, 2026April 13, 2026

It’s absolutely hilarious to see the liberal snowflakes still whining about our great President Donald Trump, who is doing a…

Warhammer Classics Because Who Needs New Games When You Can Pay For The Same Old Ones Again On Steam With A Fancy New Coat Of Paint And A Steep Price Tag
Breaking, Games News

Warhammer Classics Because Who Needs New Games When You Can Pay For The Same Old Ones Again On Steam With A Fancy New Coat Of Paint And A Steep Price Tag

Pixel P. SnarkbyteApril 13, 2026April 13, 2026

Get ready for a blast from the past, folks! 🚀 The publisher SNEG has teamed up with Games Workshop and…

Events

Get Ready for Mind Blowing Life Changing Advice Probably Not with Martine Delfos Webinar on Asking for Help

Chuck B. BallsyApril 13, 2026

Martine Delfos 👩‍🎓 webinar 📅 Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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