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Month: May 2025

Witness the spectacle of a man who hasn’t seen relevance since disco, Gene Simmons, and his “band” gracing Red Bank, NJ with their presence in the balmy days of 2025 👴🏻🎸💸.
Breaking

Witness the spectacle of a man who hasn’t seen relevance since disco, Gene Simmons, and his “band” gracing Red Bank, NJ with their presence in the balmy days of 2025 👴🏻🎸💸.

Chord F. DiscordMay 6, 2025May 6, 2025

So, Gene Simmons, bless his black, leathery heart (probably from all the stage makeup), decided to grace Red Bank, New…

Hordes of Hunger Preview: Get ready to drool over graphics while being devoured by digital zombies, because apparently, that’s peak entertainment now 🤤🧟‍♀️🎮
Breaking

Hordes of Hunger Preview: Get ready to drool over graphics while being devoured by digital zombies, because apparently, that’s peak entertainment now 🤤🧟‍♀️🎮

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 6, 2025May 6, 2025

Alright, buckle up, buttercups, because we’re diving headfirst into the steaming pile of “inspiration” that is *Hordes of Hunger*. Yes,…

Is Halsey FINALLY Trying to Sound Edgy by Begging Amy Lee for a Feature? 🙄🎤🎸
Breaking

Is Halsey FINALLY Trying to Sound Edgy by Begging Amy Lee for a Feature? 🙄🎤🎸

Chuck B. BallsyMay 6, 2025May 6, 2025

OMG, is Halsey, queen of strategically placed glitter and vaguely angsty lyrics, about to collab with Amy Lee, the patron…

Gaming Industry Biz: How to squeeze every last digital penny out of your players before they rage quit 🤑
Breaking

Gaming Industry Biz: How to squeeze every last digital penny out of your players before they rage quit 🤑

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 5, 2025May 5, 2025

So, the gaming industry, huh? You thought you were just playing games for fun? WRONG! 🤣 It’s a multi-billion dollar…

Trump Vows To Reopen Joann Fabrics As Prison
The Onion

Trump Vows To Reopen Joann Fabrics As Prison

FinnMay 5, 2025May 5, 2025

    Read MoreThe OnionWASHINGTON—Vowing to restore and revitalize the facilities as a symbol of law, order, and justice, President Donald Trump…

Newly Discovered Mosaic Law Required Israelites To Separate Themselves From Android Users
Babylon Bee

Newly Discovered Mosaic Law Required Israelites To Separate Themselves From Android Users

FinnMay 5, 2025

SINAI — Scholars marveled at the revelation of what was described as a long-hidden passage of religious text, as a…

Napalm Death in Charlotte, NC (05/01/2025)
Videos

Napalm Death in Charlotte, NC (05/01/2025)

Chuck B. BallsyMay 5, 2025

Barney speaks clearly about religion!

Napalm Death in Charlotte, NC (05/01/2025)
Videos

Napalm Death in Charlotte, NC (05/01/2025)

Chuck B. BallsyMay 5, 2025

Grindcore from England (without Shane Embury for some reason)

Oh, so the Pokémon TCG is blessing us peasants with slightly shinier cardboard for the Black and White anniversary? 🙄✨💸
Breaking

Oh, so the Pokémon TCG is blessing us peasants with slightly shinier cardboard for the Black and White anniversary? 🙄✨💸

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 5, 2025May 5, 2025

OMG, you guys, The Pokémon Company is STILL milking the nostalgia cow! 🐮🐄 Like, seriously, are they EVER going to…

Napalm Death in Charlotte, NC (05/01/2025)
Videos

Napalm Death in Charlotte, NC (05/01/2025)

Chuck B. BallsyMay 5, 2025

Grindcore from England (without Shane Embury for some reason)

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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